Category: Australian Survivor

Australian Survivor – Sun, Sept 11

The ads are talking up tonight’s ep as the “biggest blunder ever”, so let’s hope it’s not all hype. Does Phoebe set a honey trap for Rohan and convince him to hand over his idol (shades of Erik the ice cream scooper), then vote him out?

Here we go
Finally, yellow team’s Craig gets a chance to read the piece of paper he found in his napkin at the tribe shuffle feast. Plus he’s sporting a spiffy new tank top – guess since it goes for 55 days the contestants were allowed to pack more than one top this time. It gives him clues about the idol being hidden in a spot that gets covered at high tide.
Over at blue Jennah Louise is the odd person out, with no connections to her tribemates (well, other than Nick, but she’s his arch nemesis).
At yellow, Pigtails Kristie is using the tried and tested method of doing yoga on the beach in a bid to get Kate to like her. Kat is sucking up to yellow by giving Craig a massage (ick), saying he feels tight. “It’s probably because we sleep on logs,” he replies. I like Craig.
Former blues Model Rohan and Lawyer Phoebe know they have to come up with a plan or they’re toast – but Rohan has an idol.
Yellow is keen to win the challenge, given it is composed of people Nick basically rejected in the schoolyard pick for the tribe swap – or people who though they had voted him out on that twisty nighty where tribal was a fakeout.

Come on in, guys
It’s challenge time and for once it’s not in the ocean. JLap tries to elicit some fighting words from a few players before revealing that the mud pit in front of them is a take on the old Survivor challenge where they use their bodies to scoop up as much mud as possible. Usually this involves sets of scales or a bucket but today they have to fill up a wooden box.
The winners get to go somewhere where there is a shower, toothbrushes and razors. Flick is most excited about the razor, planning to cut a few throats with it later on.
The challenge begins and Conner uses his shirt to scoop up a bunch of mud and Lee carries a big blob on his head (a method Woo of the floppy hair employed effectively in one of his seasons). At first a couple of the girls don’t even get their faces or hair muddy – what the! There are quite a few “oh – sorry” moments as tribemates grab the muddy ones on their bits in a bid to scrape off the mud.
Blue team wins convincingly. At the very least Nick would be familiar with the challenge from past seasons, so perhaps they discussed a winning strategy.
“Do you want a hug?” a barely recognisable mud-coated Nick asks JLap. If only he’d said yes – that would truly set him apart from Jeff, and it’s not like he even wears the same shirt every day.
Pigtails Kristie tells the camera it’s ok to lose reward as long as you win immunity. Hmm, Kristie is getting a lot of air time. What does this mean?

At reward
The girls wash each other and shave their legs – why would you bother? The boys wash each other and Lee even cleans Jennah Louise’s ears with a cotton bud. JL is wondering how she can sneak her way in when Kylie starts telling her to not give in. JL is hopeful she can join up with El, Lee and Sam also, but we’ve yet to see evidence of this.

More Kristie confessionals as her losing yellow tribe heads to the ocean to rinse off.
Rohan uses the cleaning time to schmooze up to Conner and Andrew but Andrew is straight on to him. Rohan spills his guts to them about everything that happened at his old team’s past tribals (including that they tried to vote out Kat) and he tells them that he got the idol clue. Silly Rohan – Phoebe is going to kill you. Andrew straight away tells Kat what was said and she is quick to (wisely) throw Rohan under the bus, saying he has the idol. And even if he didn’t, I’d still be saying that he did.
Craig is finding it hard to get away from camp to look for the idol, given, as he says, the tides come in and out every six hours. He needs to tell someone so they can help him look.
Instead, he gets the whole tribe to go for a walk in the guise of “exploring”, which apparently they’ve never before done. This is hard to believe, so perhaps production told them they weren’t allowed to.

Blue team arrives back from the reward to find their whole camp is drenched, the fire is out and life sucks again. Over at yellow they are also freezing and sleepless but businessman Andrew seems to be tolerating it well, although he has more body fat than the girls. Nanna Sue is over being wet and not having had a decent sleep since the game began but, again, seems rather stoic about it.

Immunity challenge time
Brooke tells JLap the spa challenge revealed a few people were lightweights at drinking champers but, sadly, we didn’t see any of that. I love it on US Survivor when people who are starving get drunk and say things they shouldn’t.
The challenge is basically a game of super rough basketball played in waist-deep water. Coma Kate proves a physical force for yellow and Lee and Rohan have a good ole wrestle now they are rivals – no doubt photos of this muscle-bound match-up will be popping up over the net by now. Nick sinks one for blue. Kylie takes numerous shots for blue (she’s probably the shortest girl out there) and finally sinks one.
I love watching Kat have a death grip around the waist of teeny Brooke, and again Kate sinks the ball. The last round is the all-boys challenge again. There’s a lot of giving each other boardshort wedgies. Eventually they are all so knackered no-one has the heart to chase down Magic Matt when he gets free with the ball, and he wins it for blue. There is much hugging, even between opponents – something you don’t see on US Survivor. I’m guessing the challenge took a long time to film and they were all just glad it was finally over.
So, Nick is safe for another night at least and Rohan must be panicking.

Back at yellow – after a little joking about how much Craig enjoyed holding some of those blue boys tightly – Phoebe is dispirited and we get a glimpse of the bandage under Kate’s arm but no boil update – dammit. She tries to get in with Kate but Kate’s non-committal (and, also, Kate isn’t exactly at the top of her alliance so she probably doesn’t know what’s happening). Rohan blurts out to Sue that the idol was found (then immediately regrets it) and, then, while Kat is within earshot, tells Sue and Conner how dangerous and evil Kat is and that he wants to target her.
“I’ll write down Rohan and it will be the greatest day of my life,” Kat tells Craig and Sue afterwards. Kat and Craig would be a great team going forward, if they can trust each other. Interestingly yellow seems to have totally embraced Conner as one of them, but they are dubious about Kat. “She’s a flipper,” says Craig as, in the jungle, Kat tries to convince Kristie to vote for Rohan.

Phoebe tells Rohan she will be the target and that she needs his idol, but doesn’t think he will hand it over. Well, people have fallen for the honey trap (such as Erik the ice-cream scooper) before, so you never know.
Phoebe tries to convince Kat and Kristie to vote for Sue, so that if Rohan plays the idol one of the yellow core will go home. Which shows a marked lack of strategy – why not go for a stronger player, like Craig? Sure, Sue has social game but Craig is an obvious triple threat and would look good as a “scalp” when it comes to showing you can make the big moves.

Tribal council
JLap starts with a chat about how they all felt about the tribe shakeup (it’s not a merge, JLap!). Andrew says how great it was to keep his original tribe together – how soon Jennah Louise has been forgotten. Andrew tells the former reds that if any of them are worried about their futures they need to join the yellow vote. Phoebe realises – and only just now, it seems – that she’s out of the loop. There’s a bit of whispering between Rohan and Phoebe and Phoebe and Kat. God I hope Kat goes with yellow, just so I can see Phoebe and Rohan’s faces.
Interestingly, a sick-looking Phoebe votes for Sue while Rohan votes for Kat (who’s wearing her striped palazzo pants). Andrew votes for Phoebe.

The votes are about to be read and Phoebe plays the idol – so Rohan DID give it to her. I feel a bit gipped we didn’t get a dramatic handing over at tribal. Let’s hope yellow split the vote.
JLap reads the votes: Rohan, Kat, Sue, Pheobe (sic), Pheobe, Phoebe, Pheb’s (sic), Pheobe (sic) and Rohan. Rohan is gone. Phoebe looks dreadful.
Phoebe turns to Kat: “We could have had four-four.”. Kat: “Now we’re all on the bottom.”

Next time: All we see is Kat talking about getting revenge on Rohan and annoying Phoebe. That’s it. No challenge preview, no strategising.
Vote reveal: Boy, yellow were lucky the old reds were so disorganised, as they left themselves wide open by all voting for Phoebe. We see Kat and Kristie cast the two Rohan votes.

So, Kat, Kristie and Phoebe will be in trouble next time round but their votes for Rohan may give them an in with some of the core yellows. Perhaps Andrew will use them to move against Craig – a desire he mentioned some episodes ago, once, and about which we’ve not heard since. And if the core yellow does decide to stick together there will be seem easy vote offs that will last them to the real merge.



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Australian Survivor – When 3 tribes become 2

It’s a shame the previews told us straight out there’s a tribe shuffle tonight, rather than teasing us, but there you go.
Nick had better hope he doesn’t wind up on the tribe with his old yellow nemeses in it.
Will JLap don gloves again just to stare at Kate’s wound?
No recap from me tonight as it’s 22C here and we’re off to the show later with Master 4.



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Australian Survivor – Mon, Sept 5

So, I reckon the ads about Kate and a possible medevac will prove to be a total beat-up. Who’s with me?
Over at his new tribe Nick is trying to do an Ozzy, fishing and crabbing to keep the tribe well fed.
But Brooke is not fooled and thinks he’s a snake. The pretty girl alliance is working on Teigan and seems to have won her over. Urgh. I just wish Teigan would team up with Nick, Matt and Kylie.
Over at yellow Andrew is keen to put newbies Spidey Sam and Conner to use for whatever it is he’s planning – presumably booting out Craig.
Sam must be missing the gym, because he’s doing chin-ups on a tree branch. Save your energy, Sam! They must be feeding them too well. Coma Kate is feeling on the bottom of her tribe (which is true) and decides to reach out to Sam and Conner, also, even though she’s one of these “I don’t like alliances” people. Kate is a naturally fit for them but she’s not strategic enough and Andrew is playing the game hard – as he should.
Nick’s brain is still working overtime and he raises the idea of a split vote with Matt, trying to either vote out Kylie or at the very least flush out the idol and target Teigan.
Magic Matt likes the idea but, as Brooke tells him, Nick is “a sneaky bugger”. They like the idea but want to target Nick instead of Teigan.
Over at yellow, everyone is checking out Kate’s armpit and her gross lump. It would be hard for her, not having a mirror in which to look.

It’s challenge time …
And everyone goes nuts when they realise the winner gets a Hungry Jack’s feast.
For the runner-up, each tribe member gets a Whopper junior.
For yellow, Andrew is sitting out AGAIN. What’s that about?
The challenge involves balancing on a barrel and slowly pulling on a rope to travel about 20 metres. Firey Kylie, as expected, is a gun at the walking on the barrel bit. I bet she days triathlon and Tough Mudder all the time.
After a spate of successes, red is once again sucking at challenges and this time Lee and Kate are looking on helplessly as their teammates dither. Again, they’ve put Lee last as the final element of the challenge involves chucking stuff.
Blue team wins the challenge and Kate and Sue are desperately trying to not let red erode their lead. “And Sue throws it backwards!” yells JLap. Uh oh.
Kat actually lands one of the beanbags – good for her, proving she can do well in a physical challenge! Luckily for yellow, Kate knows how to throw forwards, and she nabs second place for her team.
(Side note: During this, Mr Juz is faffing around on his iPad. “You’re not watching?” I ask. “Nah, I’ll watch them when they eat their hamburgers. That’s the only bit I want to see.” He’s a simple man …”
It looks like there are no vegetarians in this season, as everyone rips into their burgers. Poor reds are stuck with beans and rice and Lee is particularly down about their string of losses. The former professional cricketer is just not used to being around people who suck at some things. And he’s missing his kids. But it’s ok, he soon recovers and is eating rice clad only in his undies, so again all is right with the world.

Immunity challenge
This is a challenge I don’t recall seeing before on Survivor. One member from each tribe is hoisted up above the water. They are anchored by one person at a time holding a rope while standing in the shallows.
Wisely, the teams send up the light girls to be hoisted. Blue team goes through anchors fairly quickly, although Nick does last 25 minutes. They don’t have any bulky, tall guys and must not be allowed to wrap the rope around themselves for support. For yellow, Craig is a total gun, lasting 52 minutes before handing over to Sam.


(Anyone else think Craig probably usually has less body fat but ate more calories than usual in preparation for the Survivor diet?)
Blue loses while the other teams are still on their second (muscular) person.
Just as everyone heads off JLap yells out to Kate he noticed something under her arm. Oh, right, it was totally JLap who spotted it. The medic takes a look at the potential Vesuvius and tells JLap it looks infected. JLap pushes hard for a “yes” to the “could Kate be pulled from the game?”. I’m a bit disappointed we don’t know the name of this doctor, as in their appearances in US Survivor they get much more camera time and become characters in their own right.
And here we go: Kate is lying down and the doc is hovering near the pustule with a large syringe. Aagh! This is worse than that worm crawling out of Jen’s ear last season. Look away!
JLap just looms over her … hold her hand, JLap! He’s wearing latex gloves but his bedside manner leaves something to be desired. Even if she’s used to being prodded from her coma days, no-one wants to be operated on lying on a beach.
For the viewer’s benefit, he says: “You’re going to put a wick inside to help the pus drain out.” Ewww! The doc says she’s fine to continue in the game as long as she heals well.

At the blue beach, Nick is trying to work out how to save his skin and tries to put his vote Kylie or Teigan plan into action. Teigan isn’t feeling the love as much as Nick is, but says she won’t write his name down.
The pretty girl alliance tells Firey Kylie (with the idol) they need to vote out sneaky Nick – they lay it on pretty thick how much they love Kylie. I wish Kylie would just go try to form an alliance with someone – anyone.
Flick tells Magic Matt that Nick needs to go but Matt wants to keep him around to help in challenges even though “I don’t trust him from a bar of soap [sic]”. “Right now, we kind of need the snake,” he says. (And not that he mentions it, but Teigan has a dodgy tatt of some Asian scribble on her neck that looks dreadful.)


At tribal council
Teigan says it’s all puppies and roses at her new tribe, while Nick goes in hard on how good he is at puzzles, and reminds everyone he did well in the physical challenge today (and he gets JLap’s approval for standing against the bigger units of the cast).
Kylie isn’t wearing her idol this time but will she actually play it? Nick pitches that he’s also good to keep around as his nemesis, the yellow tribe, will be gunning for him in the future and he’s a “meat shield”.
Kylie decides to play the idol, because she doesn’t want to go home having sucked at a challenge (hey, Kylie, you weigh less than half of those guys and are about half as tall).
I’m thinking Teigan is going home, as she got a fair bit of camera time tonight. The votes are split between Kylie, Nick and Teigan, so it’s time for a revote, removing Kylie from the mix.
On the revote, JLap only reads votes for Teigan (and we see at the end that every tribe member did indeed vote for her). Nick is going to need to change his undies, but he probably only has one pair. I’m glad he’s still in it as Teigan didn’t seem too fussed about playing the game.
[And we see later that for the first round of voting, pretty girl alliance voted Nick, Teigan and Nick voted Kylie, Kylie and Magic Matt voted Teigan.]

Next time
The tribes are merging from three into two. Yay! We should see some scrambling … and get an update on Kate’s armpit.



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Australian Survivor – Sun, Sept 4

Our recorder has blown a gasket so I’m watching live tonight and, darn it, I missed the first few minutes.
Over at yellow shelter Sam and Conner are getting used to their new digs, while Nick (aka Aussie Rob C, but much brasher) and Tegan arrive at blue to find the shelter is soaking wet. Nice welcome.
“I’m out for blood,” says Nick, adding he was surprised Sue (the naughty Nanna) betrayed him.
I can’t wait to see what red tribe’s reaction to the swap is at the next challenge.
It’s night and a storm is lashing the island, leaving everyone – even Chester the chicken – soaking and dispirited. Except, that is, red tribe, because they finally won a challenge and got all of yellow’s previously won comfort items and gear. Cricketer Lee is obviously not used to losing so he’s stoked things are looking up.
Over at yellow, new tribe member Spidey Sam knows he’s no longer the top of the totem pole.
At blue, Flick knows she had a lucky escape. I’m really interested to hear Magic Matt’s take on all this. Nick’s strategy is to be super helpful around camp and he chops up a coconut with ease. We finally get to hear Tegan speak and straight away Brooke gets to work on drawing her into the pretty girl alliance. Tegan doesn’t seem to have much strategy and because she was weirded out by the truth or honesty test (and is a model/personal trainer) I’m thinking she’s a recruit rather than a student of the game. It’s actually in Tegan’s interest to distance herself from Nick, to make him a target should the team go to tribal again, but she doesn’t seem to be doing so consciously.

What the hell is it with Survivor and yoga? Is it compulsory to whip out Downward Dog at the auditions? Pigtails Kristy and Lawyer Phoebe are bending it on the beach and Kristy seems to have recovered from her paranoid “they moved my bag” freakout.


They have a chat about how expendable Model Rohan but Phoebe’s real bond is with El the army chick.
Suddenly Nick is sporting a brown fedora. Where did that come from? He gets to work ingratiating himself with his new tribe and seems to make headway with Magic Matt, who reveals he’s pissed off with the pretty girl alliance of Flick and Brooke.


At yellow, Conner is liking the yellow vibe (and we learn the chicken’s name is Apricot – clever) but he knows he’s in danger because he’s no super human and he thinks the tribe would rather keep Sam. With such big numbers I’d be ditching Sam and keeping Conner, who can more easily be won over to their side.
We finally get some Dreads Barry back story (about his time playing with the Wallabies), so he could be going tonight as he’s treating Survivor like a school camping and ignoring the Outwit and Outplay aspects of the game. And that’s what happen when you recruit people, even if it’s great to see cultural diversity in the cast.

It’s challenge time …
JLap does the “come on in” and red’s minds are blown to realise no-one went home and there was a tribal swap. The challenge contains a component that is a Survivor classic: binding sticks together to create a long pole that can then hook a key.
Conner said he sucked at challenges but, boy, the little fella had some speed on him racing out to the frame in the water.
Blue and yellow get their poles built quickly but they are quite bendy and blue drops their key on the sand and have to drag it. Red has made El and Kat the pole builders – setting Kat up to be in the firing line again? Blue are first to the firemaking station and Nick gets a spark straight away. They win immunity.
Yellow is having trouble getting their fire to build up enough (was Nick their fire starter?) but red still doesn’t have their key off. On the sidelines Lee, Phoebe and Rohan are slowly dying watching the girls try to hook it. Finally they get it but Lee and Rohan must be the best fire builders, otherwise they would have been on the pole building. Lee gets it started quickly and they are doing a good job building it up, sheltering the flame nicely. Well, I’m actually glad, for Kat’s sake, that she’s not in the firing line yet again, as she surely would have been. I just hope that when she is voted out she burns that monstrous leopard print cardy thing in the fire along with her buff.
So, the yellow tribe is going to tribal and Conner and Sam are going to be really worried – there’s no way JLap will be throwing in another twist tonight.

Interestingly they seem to be targeting Conner, without any talk of splitting the vote in case he or Sam has a secret idol. How do they know Kylie had the only one? Conner pitches to the majority alliance that he is desperate to stay and will be a loyal number in future. And it has an impact: Coma Girl Kate is swayed by Conner’s emotion. She throws Barry’s name out as a possibility and it seems some of the others are irritated by Barry’s refusal to “play” the game. And then there’s a curveball: Andrew (in a trilbly, because felt hats are totally suitable for the climate in Samoa) tells the camera he wants Craig out, because he’s a threat. He approaches Naughty Nanna Sue, seeking support. Finally! People who want to make moves and not just hold hands and sing Kumbaya.


At tribal council …
JLap awkwardly questions Sam and Conner about how much it sucks to be on a new tribe and then tries to get some dirt on last week’s Nick blindside. Then he reminds Craig and Baz how bad they were at building a fire in the challenge. JLap has been doing quite well until this episode as Survivor host, but his line of questioning tonight is stilted and they are draaaaggging it out. Not good editing.
I hope it’s Barry.
The votes are read and it IS Barry! Hooray. The question will be whether anyone clued Sam and Conner in to the vote (judging by the vote footage at the end, they did).

Tomorrow night
Kate has a horrible-looking lump under her arm that looks ready too explode, reminiscent of the last season of US Survivor when everyone was sporting pus-filled boils, which resulted in ice-cream maker Neale being ousted on medical grounds. I hope Kate stays – she seems a good egg. And that JLap puts his medical background to good use. Lance it, JLap – that would be grosser than any bug-eating challenge.

What did we think?
Well, it wasn’t as twisty as the last episode and tribal council was boring and awkward, but it’s always good when tribes don’t take the easy option and vote out the newest tribe members, especially when they are people who really want to play. I’m hoping Magic Matt and Nick build up a decent alliance over at blue and are able to pull Tegan away from the pretty girl alliance.



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Australian Survivor – videos

An interesting behind-the-scenes video about the art department’s work on challenges for Australian Survivor.
Cool to see lots of Samoans working for the show.

AND, a preview for Sunday night.



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Australian Survivor – Mon, Aug 29 – It’s all about chests

How long will it be before a tribe shake-up? Hard to know with such a huge cast. Chat here for Australian Survivor.

I just added some thoughts about last night’s (Sunday’s) episode to the previous Survivor post http://talkingtv.net/2016/08/australian-survivor-episode-3/

Monday Survivor
1. Doesn’t Phoebe know people who talk about how well they are positioned in the game always get their comeuppance?
2. When the yellow team credits rolled there was a blonde woman with a double barelled name who I swear must have just been helicoptered in to Samoa.
3. Nick is in trouble unless there is a tribe shakeup soon.
4. How frustrating was it when Kylie and Pete were wandering past the mud wall that so obviously is where the idol is hidden. What are they expecting: a brick wall? At least Pete has the excuse he’s unwell.
4a. Will Kate’s decision to be so frank with her tribe about her dreadful accident bite her down the track? She could be seen as a big threat to win due to her overcoming such adversity.
5. OMG – JLap is wearing a cap at the challenge, but it’s not a Probst-style two toner.
6. It’s another similar challenge of running, climbing, hauling and puzzling. I look forward to them whittling down the numbers so we can get to the more interesting balance and endurance challenges.
7. Even JLap calls Pete “Fiegsy”. Awesome.
8. JLap notes yellow are “half swimming, half running – like dolphins.” Hmm, running dolphins, JLap?
9. Lee was showing some Andrew Savage-like qualities with his super strength in the challenge.
10. It was a challenge of chests, both made of wood and muscle.
11. As long as every challenge ends in a puzzle, blue needs to keep magician Matt and yellow Nick.
12. Glad they changed the rules so the puzzlers can tap out. But it still doesn’t help red. Kate must be relieved they can’t point the finger at her
13. I like yellow asking JLap to make a deal so they can get flint, and thus fire (their flint broke). He must have been clued up before as, unlike Probst, he doesn’t get narky about it, but just says it’s a deal if they return all their comfort items and fishing gear. I wish he’d thrown in “and you’ll also be going to tribal council”, just to mix things up.
14. We haven’t seen much of formerly crazy Pigtails Kristy.
15. Lee comes across as not a big fan of the show. He’s not into strategy at all.
16. The girls need to blindside Rohan now while he would be reluctant to play the idol so early. Losing a physical player isn’t such a consideration with a tribe shakeup no doubt just around the corner; the loyalty of an alliance is more important. Being the underdog tribe going into a merge is actually an advantage, as you can become the swing vote for the stronger tribes.
17. But before we get to tribal, it’s over to blue beach, presumably for Pete to request a medevac. And here comes JLap on a speedboat. Please, please put your doctorin’ past to good use, JLap. Fiegsy says he’s barely eaten for 12 days, after picking up a bug before filming began. He’s quitting – and no physical from JLap.
18. “He’s a ripper bloke,” says Magician Matt – words you’d never here in US Survivor. So Pete is gone and we still don’t know why he was rocking a red suit.
19. The Aussies need to learn to be more circumspect at tribal. They should have studied Boston Rob tribal footage.
20. So no-one’s going home tonight from red because of Fiegsy quitting. I can’t recall US Survivor every waiting til another team got to the ready to vote stage before telling them they had a reprieve.
21. Looks like things are pretty awkward at red next week with Kat justifiably angry she was on the chopping block. They’d better hope they don’t merge before they can lose again and ditch her, or she’ll be throwing bombs at them.



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Australian Survivor episode 3

How’s everyone enjoying Australian Survivor and JLap’s sinewy forearms thus far?
From now we get three episodes a week – Sunday, Monday, Tuesday – that’s three tribal councils in three days! That’s a killer pace.
There’s a peek at tomorrow night’s ep on TenPlay
How many lingering shots of Lee’s abs will we get during the challenge? And how many confessionals from the I’m-So-Not-A-Drama-Teacher guys explaining how he’s fooling people with his acting.
Survivor Know-It-Alls Rob Cesternino (Survivor Amazon and All Stars – and the king of US reality TV podcasting) and Stephen Fishbach (Tocantins and Second Chances) are doing an Australian Survivor podcast and it’s fascinating to hear what these students of the game think. If you don’t have a podcasting program on your phone or iPad you can just listen to it straight off Rob’s website here.
If you are a fan of US Survivor you should be listening to their usual podcast – they have heaps of special former Survivors as guests, who provide insight into strategy and behind-the-scenes goings on.

I just watched Sunday’s episode so some quick thoughts.
1. Rohan dropped the clue!! What the hell? Smart of drama teacher dude to go searching for evidence but sadly he comes across so shady to others it’s not going to help him. It’s a pity drama teacher has been stuck on the Beauty Tribe.
2. Who the heck is Tegan? Poor Nick getting stuck with her for the honesty or deceit test. Has she never seen the show?
3. That honesty or deceit test always causes trouble no matter what they choose. Traditionally people choose deceit, but those who are honest always have the finger pointed at them anyway.
4. Hidden immunity idols are often a whole lot of trouble anyway. I’d choose deceit and then show everyone the real clue. And they’d probably still think I was lying about something!
5. Why did the tribe who voted out Bianca last week let Sickly Pete and Firey Kylie go off on their own – the only two people who have reason to be angry about the outcome of tribal.
6. JLap needs a challenge catchphrase that’s not “come on in, guys”.
7. A few people sustained injuries from toppling blocks in the last season of US Survivor (Beauty, Brains, Brawn II). Interesting no-one tried the strategy of stacking the last three blocks together and THEN putting them atop the tower first up, although at least blue twigged to it at the end, seco
8. Boy, red sucked at the boat part of that challenge.
9. Good job, yellow Nick. Who’d have thought the tribe that built a shelter that immediately collapsed under their weight would do so well in challenges.
10. G’day Chester the chicken. Sadly, you’ll never be as famous as Mark the Chicken.
11. I hope there is a gross food challenge in the future involving sea cucumber because blues will be hurling.
12. What is in Evan’s hair?
13. Did you see the panic stricken look on Kat’s face when Cricketer Lee told her she could do the puzzle section of the challenge.
14. At least Barry with the Dreads got to speak.
15. Do they deliberately ask Lee to oil up before shooting his confessionals? I presume those abs are glistening with sunscreen.
16. I’m glad for Evan’s sake that Lee actually voted for Kat.



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Australian Survivor recap episode 2 – Mon, Aug 22

Post the first tribal council the reds chat about how Des knew he had it coming. In the pitch black pigtails Kristie starts complaining her bag and shirt are missing and she reckons someone’s moved them because she’s an outsider. Uh oh – if you’re paranoid don’t let it show, Kristie. Although I wouldn’t put it past Des to do a Russell and bury belongings in the sand.
Over at blue everyone’s chilled because they have fire, water and shelter and it’s not raining – plus they won the first two challenges. Secret Squirrel Bianca is waiting for the cracks to appear and has noticed the two younger girls are tight and get on with Spidey Sam. She forges an alliance with firefighter Kylie and hopes to draw in old burny hand Conner.


Finally Kristie’s bag turns up and I wish we’d seen from the edit whether it had in fact been there the whole time. Kristie starts to lose it in a lonely spot in the jungle and good on army lady El for trying to calm her down. Is she losing the plot or did her drama teacher “friend” take it to make his position more secure/
Over at yellow Barry with the dreads finally makes the edit, joking about popping out for a croissant. Poor yellow still don’t have fire, so haven’t drunk water. Nick is licking palm fronds for moisture. He sets to with the flint and finally they get some coconut husk on fire, but they don’t even have a supply of tinder nearby to keep it going. The flame splutters out and Nick is devo.


Drama dude Evan *who is telling people he’s an art teacher) is trying to buddy up to ex-cricketer Lee because he thinks he can outwit him, but Lee of the clingy trunks and over-developed torso has twigged to Evan being a wildcard and is keeping him close to keep tabs on him.

Yellow try again to make fire and, finally, it works. Everyone seems to be chowing down at all the tribes – are they not rationing or were the producers generous for the first season?
Finally, 62-year-old Peter the air traffic controller and ex-military guy gets some air time. He did really well with the physical aspect of the challenge in last night’s episode but is now struggling – and tells Bianca so. He reckons he should leave. Nooo, Peter – we don’t even know you! Meanwhile, Flick and fellow young girl decide fit firey Kylie is totes annoying and should go.

Challenge time
JLap and his sinewy arms are back and he gets red to confess they still don’t have fire, when even the dorks at yellow managed it. The challenge involves, um, carrying, smashing, wriggling, knocking stuff over, yadda yadda. It’s an immunity AND a reward challenge, with the winner getting fishing gear. Runner-up gets a fishing line and hooks. Sue and Peter, the two oldest people yet, sit out the challenge. Can we get an update on Conner’s hand? As a qualified doctor, can JLap check if it’s a serious burn?
Super blues are smashing it in the challenge, yet again, and that poor brunette is going to have so many bruises. And again loser yellow manage to overtake the reds, who are again quibbling about how to do things.


Poor reds then have to do the course again with beefcake Lee as the person being carried. Why didn’t they choose someone lighter? Counting on him to smash all the blocks at the end – I guess he was a bowler when he played Big Bash.
Yellow wins thanks to the throwing of Kate, the women who survived a serious car accident years ago. For blue, weedy student Conner is throwing furiously but he can’t outgun Lee’s mighty guns.


Blue is heading to tribal council. Will Peter put his hand up to go home? Conner is worried he’s on the chopping block due to his challenge performance. Spidey Sam and Firey Kylie pow wow and decide Peter needs to go home because he’s not eating or drinking, even though he’s well liked.
But Bianca is worried that will put her on the wrong side of the numbers, so she tells Conner Flick should go. And he promptly tells Flick. Who then wants to get rid of Bianca.
As magician Matt notes, everyone is going nuts with the scrambling.

Tribal council


Come on – they can’t send Pete home before we discover why he’s wearing crimson pants. JLap is in his tribal uniform of checked shirt and chinos. He tries to find a crack in tribe unity but Flick and Kylie don’t bite. So he probes Pete about his illness, which is explained as not wanting to eat. Conner and Brunette Brooke say they could be in danger for their challenge performance, but they’re not. Hopefully Conner sticks around – he’s a sweetie.
Flick and Brooke tell JLap they’d never considered them being close could be perceived as a threat … der, girls! Have you not watched the show? You need a Malcolm and Denise secret alliance not a sorority sisters alliance.
JLap reads the votes and there’s one for Kylie, two for Pete and the rest Bianca.
Farewell, Secret Squirrel – you would have fared better on another tribe.

Next time
Well, we know Pete is still around because we see footage of him. It looks like there is one of those advantage twists where only a few tribe members are given secret info and have to decide whether or not to reveal it (as seen in the Blue Collar, White Collar etc season). These rarely end well.

Fun fact
I googled who on Survivor has started a fire using glasses, and came across this from an interview with fan fave Yau Man: “You don’t just hold your glasses over dry fiber – it would never work since your glasses are concave lenses and cannot focus the sun. the trick is to put a drop of water on the glass – it acts as a very powerful magnifying glass”
There you go – some sciencey learning.



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Australian Survivor starts tonight

Hooray – the wait is over. Australian Survivor starts on Channel 10 at 7.30pm, with episode 2 the following night.
It will be interesting to see how the twice-a-week format plays out. Host Jonathon LaPaglia has said they filmed a tribal council every two days, as opposed to the US original’s every three days, and the contestants are there for 55 days in total, rather than the usual 39.


The promos are looking pretty slick so, thankfully, it looks much better than the pathetic attempt at an Aussie version of the classic reality show a decade ago.
I showed my four-year-old the cast photos and asked him to pick a winner and he chose Peter “because he got a big smile”. Usually older guys don’t fare well unless they are firefighter Tom types, but who knows …
contestant1
contestant2
Make sure you vote in the new poll.

HERE WE GO
I’ve already seen the first six minutes but Mr Juz has not. He’s not a fan, although he watched some of Australia, Amazon and Pirate Islands.
Jonathan LaPaglia walks to camera and Mr Juz is mesmerised by his sinewy arms. “God, he’s ripped. Did they deliberately pick someone who looks like Wolverine?” How many push ups did he do by the rockpools to get the veins to pop like that?
I like that he is kinda rugged looking, like Jeff Probst, but not a clone.
We’ll be giving first impressions as we watch the show (but no white rose):
First talking head is Conner (23, law student ACT): Mr Juz says – Likeable, will go far. Me: Yep, has that nerdy Rob C quality and young guys aren’t usually an early boot.
Geez, Samoa looks stunning – tou
El (33, Army corporal, Qld): Mr Juz: army hero, first to crumble. Me: She may be tempted to be a tribal leader, which always results in an exit by about episode five.
Lee (40, ex pro cricketer) Mr Juz: Everyone will him.
Des (59, courier driver, Qld): Mr Juz: He’ll be the mixed metaphor guy, coming up with the pearlers. Me: Looks a Keith Nail type for the one liners but without Keith’s wiry nimbleness. Fitness could be an issue in some of the early team challenges if there is a lot of running and swimming, which is customary. Older folks always go first – unless they are the only ones who can build fire.
Phoebe (27, criminal lawyer, NSW): Mr Juz: Bland. Me: People who talk about how great they are at interrogating others are headed for a fall.
Evan (30, high school drama teacher, Vic): Mr Juz: Delusional. Me: Cocky, but at least he seems to have an understanding of the game.
Flick (23, bartender and personal assistant): Mr Juz: She’s going to fail miserably in her strategy. Me: Meh.
Sam (28, charity co-founder and CEO): Mr Juz: Genuine nice guy. My pick for final two. Me: Could be cocky, but perhaps the horrible spider web should tatt is prejudicing me.
Andrew (29, marketing executive, Qld): Mr Juz: I’m going to enjoy watching that guy – that guy is me (re: his hatred of the outdoors). Me: I do feel sorry that anyone who’s a business person has to wear totally unsuitable clothing, as per Survivor casting directive. Cirie hated the outdoors and she did very well in Survivor. I’m not convinced about Andrew – will he rub people the wrong way or he is playing a villain?
Kylie (38, firefighter, Vic): Mr Juz: I like her. Me: She’s very likeable. Will go far but could get taken out near the end because she’s an obvious threat.

The contestants meet JLap and his arms a still a-poppin’. He gets a few contestants to chat and, first mistake, Des reveals his real age. Should have shaved off a few years. Conner seems personable and is obviously a fan – hope he doesn’t get lost in strategy.
They’re going with the three-tribe format: red, blue and yellow (who can remember the Samoan names?)
JLap points to a lit cauldron floating on a raft out in the ocean behind him. Whoever swims to it first and lights a torch gets fire for the tribe. But there’s another raft with general camp stuff, which they also need, so they’ll need to balance both needs. A girl called Tegan grabs a chicken, which usually turn out to be more trouble than they are worth.
Red tribe isn’t very good at getting into their canoe. They partially flood it and plantains float everywhere. Blue tribe is first to untie, followed by yellow. Both send out two swimmers. Red team wisely realises they suck and instead loads up on supplies. Smart – history has shown most water provided on Survivor isn’t as impure as the producers make out and is safe to drink without boiling. Of course, fire is nice for warmth but dehydration is a bigger worry than being cold.
Sam the spiderweb man is first to light the torch and wins fire for the blues, which include Conner and Kylie the firefighter.

We get the iconic Survivor music and intro and the tribes are at their own beaches, getting to know each other rather than building a shelter straight away. At red old fella Des reveals he used to be in the army so is used to sleeping rough. Rohan sparks laughter when he says he’s a model (but reveals to camera he has several degrees). Brand manager Kat in the floppy hat assumes the boss role (danger, danger!) and the others start chopping down branches. Des says to camera he wants to save his strength: “I’m going to try and do as little physical work as possible.” Kat comes over to tell him to help and he barks back: “I’m just getting the fruit out of the sun so it don’t go crap.” I was really hoping we’d see him dash into the jungle to look for hidden immunity idols, but no-one has mentioned them … yet. “I’m goimg to sit in the background like Kung Fu Panda and just sneak up on them at the end. Always wanted to play the villain,” Des says. But he’s a bit tetchy to the others, so will be an easy target if they go to tribal first.

Over at yellow beach they all look a bit clueless.
Craig (recruitment officer) says he’s gay but happy to take on the alpha males.
High school teacher Nick looks soo much like Rob C and he knows how dangerous it is to be a leader. “However, when there’s seven dodos just roaming around, you have to do something to try and coral them.” He tells the camera he’s been going to the gym, practising puzzles and seeing a hypnotist to overcome his fear of rodents (surely this piece of info will come in handy later). he realises he’s made a mistake by appearing too knowledgable and diverts everyone with an ocean swim. Businessman Andrew notes Nick has put himself in a dangerous spot from the get go.

You know leaders don't last, Nick!
You know leaders don’t last, Nick!

At blue everyone is standing round with their Olympic torch, chatting, rather than scrambling for kindling to keep their hard-won flame alight. Conner is getting A LOT of camera time.
Bianca (36, Vic) tells the tribe she works in a boring insurance job, but to camera she confesses: “I currently work as a private investigator.” Ooh – she’s a bit of a Tony I work in construction but really I’m a cop.

Bianca could go far (as long as she applies loads of sunscreen)
Bianca could go far (as long as she applies loads of sunscreen)

Oh no, nice boy Conner has already hurt himself by grabbing a hot stick. Keep it in the saltwater, Conner! Listen to firefighter Kylie. At red they have neither shelter nor fire and, to camera, army corporal El says it won’t work with wet wood. Des gives his tribemates the shits by implying he knows how to start a fire but can’t be bothered wasting his energy.
Over at blue they don’t have any building skills (as Matt says: “I’m a magician”) but they do have some go getters like Sam, Kylie and Flick. This is a strong team – poor bugger Conner, out in the water.
He and Flick finally go for a walk and they start talking alliances – good one. I was worried the Aussies wouldn’t jump in to strategy straight away. Flicks tells she may need to cut him further on as he’s strategic (which shows there’s more to her than meets the eye).
They are setting yellow up to be the loser team that gets Pagonged. Sue, 59, is a personal trainer and retired customs officer – plus she was in the army reserve: “I’m not the average nanna.” But after a while they do in fact get their act together and build a shelter. They all lie on it and – crack – it breaks in the middle. They have a laugh but they’d better hope they fix it before the rain comes.

Night falls and over at red the girls are spooning, trying to get warm. Since some are just in hot pants I’m not surprised. Des just grabs a giant banana leaf and wanders off to the side to use it as a mattress. The others follow suit but it’s a full moon and the tide comes in and threatens to wash them away. No-one gets any sleep.

The next day reds are scrambling to move their stuff out of the way of the oncoming waves. Drama teacher Evan goes for a swim in the storm surge, which is foolish. Much of the camp is under water, so they are going to have to rebuild further inland.

Challenge time
Yellows confess they didn’t start a fire but reds try to bluff for a bit, until model Rohan cracks and tells the truth.
JLap explains the challenge, which is a racing over obstacles, building bridges, pulling ropes type one, with a traditional puzzle-solving component to finish.
The obstacles are physically very challenging – there would have been a lot of cuts and bruises afterwards. Sam proves a linchpin for his blue team, hauling everyone over as needed. They are ahead at the bridge building section.
Waiting at the puzzle station, Des is calling out instructions to the red bridge builders but just pisses them off. Yellow team, who were last, pick up the pace and tears through the bridge building – it looks like Nick (aka Rob C clone) had a lot to do with it, but it could be the edit. Red are last to the puzzle.

For yellow, the puzzlers are 59-year-old Sue and businessman Andrew.
Red’s puzzlers are “leader” Kat and taciturn Des, but he’s not really listening to her.
Blue’s puzzlers are magician Matt – who’s fast – and bartender Flick. They win and yellow is second. Red wasn’t in the race, mainly thanks to Des, but really they had no choice but to put him there – he would not have made it over those steep obstacles.
Yellow team gets a flint for coming second.

Red is going to tribal. It has to be Kat or Des – and he knows it. Quick – get back to camp and light a fire, Des, if you want to save your skin.

Muscle men Rohan and Lee go for a swim, leaving the girls to chat on the beach. Women’s alliance! They reckon the boys don’t have a clue how close they are. Kat knows Des will be gunning for her. But the girls don’t seem to have pulled in a guy to help their numbers, which is a mistake. Des knows he’s in trouble and, finally, he starts giving some direction about building a decent shelter. He teaches weaving palm fronds for a shelter roof and even does a bit of schmoozing with the girls.
Des goes to get water with Rohan and alerts him to the girls’ alliance. Rohan reckons Des might be handy to keep around, now he’s showing some survival skills – after they got flooded.
Drama teacher Evan says he, Des and Pigtails Kristie are the oddball outsiders. Personally, I’d keep Des for at least one more tribal, until the shelter was schmick, then cut him.

It’s tribal council
JLap is now attired in a checked shirt and chinos. I miss his T-shirt and shorts – wardrobe changes are not very Probstian. They start with red detailing how rubbish they were at building camp, and Rohan notes Des kept his skills to himself. Des does little to take the target off his back with his explanation of the magical skills. Kat goes hard in her defence of her puzzling skills and her pointing the figure (and likely rightly so) at Des. Des tells JLap he’s voting Kat because he doesn’t like her.
It’s time to vote and Kat is up first to write down Des’s name (if Kat goes tonight she should leave her clothes behind for the others – at least she’s got a flowy cardy and three-quarter pants). Des votes for Kat: “Kat, I’m voting for you. Don’t like being told what to do. Only my wife does that.”
JLap reads the votes and … it’s Des. His fire is extinguished and, to his credit, he gives his teammates the thumbs up and says “good luck, guys”. And then they were seven – at least they get flint.

Rohan is handsome and intense in the firelight, while Des is, well, Des.
Rohan is handsome and intense in the firelight, while Des is, well, Des.

Next time
There seems to be some injuries and paranoia going on. But we only get a five-second preview so can’t analyse much.

Bye Des
“I think my wife’s going to say my wife made the right decision … because I’m very hard to live with.” We see everyone voted for Des.

So, what did we think?
Interesting there was no talk of hidden immunity idols. Surely there will be some? Some good characters there but the tribes are so darn big it’s going to take a while to keep track of all the personalities. As usual, sadly, the younger women tend to blend as one in the non-winning tribes because they don’t get any airtime. I want to see more of secretive Bianca.



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