More weddings tonight and tomorrow, honeymoons Tues and the mud wrestling AKA dinner party Wed.
I thought I would pop in to a bit of MAFS to see what was on offer this year. It seems that since its TV debut, it has been going for more and more outrageous, tattooed and trashy characters; more bogans, shrews, tarts and trout pouts, more over-sized lips and boobs, fake nails, fake personalities and pumped up drama.
So far, this lot seem slightly tamer than last year’s TV monsters. I think they have been making a mistake going for so many outrageous, aggressive and trashy couples. I think viewers would respond better to orinary, perhaps relatable, brides and grooms.
I wonder if producers have decided to strip back that Tiaras and Trash factor this year….but that remains to be seen. What we have seen so far are the usual introductions, first kisses, excited friends, protective friends, brothers and fathers, and a few honeymoon nights. We’ve had nerves, cold feet, delight and all the reactions to that first meeting at the altar that is the MAFS formula.
Amanda has been making the mistake of blabbing on about her ex. Poppy was playing almost-runaway bride. Natasha wants to escape her daddy issues. Her friend, who couldn’t afford a shirt to wear with his suit, challenged Mikey about his awkwardness.
Bridesmaids and friends asked the usual ‘hard questions’.
So, do I think I will watch this year? Maybe. Here and there. To come are the honeymoon nights, mornings after, drunken parties, tears, tantrums, break-ops, and sage narration and counselling from the the three wise monkeys, I mean relationship sexperts, who will be sure to prompt couples with probing questions like, “Have you had sex yet?”.
The blurb says: Australia’s most controversial social experiment continues. Who will marry Matt, the 29-year-old virgin, and is Sam really too good looking for love?
Please tell me they have not matched Matt with someone totally unsuitable. Nah, MAFS would NEVER do that. The experts know their love stuff.
For those of you who missed it, here is Maz’s excellent recap of the last episode (ta, Maz):
And so we come to our honeymoons because if you are going to endure the Tinder date from hell you may as well rack up the room charges.
Ning realises that she may have applied for the wrong reality show. With her obsession with food and Hot n Cold nature she deeply regrets not applying for Masterchef where abandonment and single parent status would at least have guaranteed her Top 10. Instead she is stuck with some ancient guy in her home country sipping on her cocktails praying that there is delectable fresh meat on offer come Dinner Party Time. Mark, as Daisy has pointed out, must have had some terrible dates in the past to remain this (albeit slightly now tempered) optimistic.
Heidi has a back catalogue of issues that she has not quite worked through and Mike is so not interested. Mike’s mind drifts back to the uncomplicated 20 something he probably screwed last summer and vows never to date someone over 25 again. As he utters the words “I am not a therapist”, Mike realises that he is not closing the deal tonight and may actually need to pretend to care if he it to get any action while under contractual obligation with Channel Nine.
Jessika, 27, laments that she has been paired with someone SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO old as at the geriatric age of 31 Mick can’t quite position the phone quite right to capture all her fillers. Downing a beer, Mick begins to suspect Jessika might be more interested in her Instagram profile than him. When asked, Jessika loses it and storms off not before ensuring the camera captured her chest from every angle. Angry that she has been rumbled she sniffs that Mick is too rough for her. Kettle met Pot.
Melissa still can’t understand a word Dino’s says and Google Translate is no help. Flower, anyone?
Jules and Cam get wet and Cam reluctantly replies in the affirmative to the children question buying himself some time.
Nic’s storyline is all about the cancer and whether of not he will tell Cyrell. Alas, this is where the recording cut out.
Is it just me or is this is a much bigger cast than last year?
Are we going to get at least one couple who is not there to get Insta famous?
— Married At First Sight (@MarriedAU) January 12, 2019
Read about the contestants here.
Married at First Sight starts January 28 on Nine.