The new season of the US Bachelor starts tonight on 9Life, but the episode is already up online at 9Now
The Bachie for season 21 is Nick Viall, who was twice runner-up on The Bachelorette. So he really, really likes being on TV.
First he was dumped by Andi, and this bit from Vulture.com is interesting: During the finale, at the After the Final Rose live special, when Nick gets a chance to confront Andi for the first time since they broke up, he drops a bomb that would paint him as a villain and instantly catapult him to the next phase in his Journey. In front of a live audience, Nick asks Andi, if she wasn’t in love with him, why she made love with him in the Fantasy Suite, breaking the cardinal Bachelor rule of not talking about what happens in the Fantasy Suite.
And then he hooked up with Bachelorette Kaitlyn for some R-rated fun but was again ditched in favour of another bloke.
Makes the Australian version seem so tame – no fantasy suites for us.
I think I’ll have to watch just to see if the chick in a dolphin costume gets a rose.
* I don’t like country music but that band was tight.
* I’m surprised they didn’t dress her in cowboy boots and denim; she looked liked Sandy at the end of Grease.
* I love how inappropriately dressed the girls were for the Tough Mudder challenge. Did they ask then to wear white?
* Judging from Olena’s reaction to the mozzie on her shoulder, she needs to go on I’m a Celeb next year.
* Love how Mean Girl Rachel thinks being awesome at a climbing a wall is how to get Richie’s attention; everyone knows the girls who are rubbish/cry/twist their ankles get the most Bachie attention because otherwise they look like douches.
* Finally, we get to see a sense of humour from Olena after the mudpit: “Then you can check yourself for any leeches that are sucking your blood away.”
* Richie was right: A bottle of water tipped over her face transformed Olena from mud monster to elegant model in a second.
* Boy, Rachel is competitive. But I guess we do need to have a snarky narrator and she can at least string a sentence together.
* So, at this stage I believe Keira is the only person to go on a single date and not get a rose.
* Are there any potential Bachelorettes in this season? Nikki is not outgoing off; Alex too stalkery; viewers wouldn’t warm to Kiki; Olena too aloof. Rachel too mean; and Steph is a nonentity. Hmm, maybe Faith? She’s vivacious enough but we haven’t seen much of her.
* At the cocktail party Steph is again going for the 2am at a nightclub look. Her hair looks incredible brittle.
* Can someone please teach the girls the correct phrase is “so few people”.
* Awww, poor teary Faith at the cocktail party. She seems like a nice gel.
* No white rose drama tonight.
* We didn’t get to see any of Rachel’s convo with Richie at the cocktail party. Are they trying to hide a growing relationship from the edit.
* Those dresses Nikki and Olena picked were not flattering.
* OMG he kept Steph AKA Jeanne Little’s granddaughter.
* Given Kiki was the only original left he hadn’t pashed, it’s no surprise Richie kept Faith. It was a gracious exit from her. Perhaps it was a case of Richie deciding it was easier not to draw out the Kiki thing when they were clearly not suited.
Tomorrow night
Hamish Blake crashes Faith and Richie’s single date and is their toddler for the night. This should be good. Like Richie’s old man date with Sam last season, they’ve picked a girl whom they know will be up for a bit of fun.
Tonight White Rose wielder Alex finally gets a date and the girls get a fake baby challenge. Luckily they are already used to tanties of the grown-up variety.
Faith gets the date card and as she waits on a dock for Richie the camera operator fixates lovingly on her ample bosom. Richie rocks up in aviator sunnies and a tux, pretending to know how to drive a speedboat and that there’s not a cameraman crouched awkwardly under the dash, filming him.
As affable as ever, Bachie spouts his lines with enthusiasm.
Faith has an extensive knowledge of maritime vehicles. ‘I’ve never been in a … uh … is this a yacht?” she asks. (“What do ya call these, love?” “Rissoles.”)
Luckily Richie seems to enjoy her ditziness.
They meet Dennis the flair bartender, who juggles up some martinis for them , makig me ponder if Tom Cruise still has any of the skills he learnt on the set of Cocktail.
Back at the house, it’s time for the group date card, and it’s singer Eliza, Georgia, Bacon Girl Noni, Sophie, Rachael, mysterious Olena and Villian Keira.
Back on the date Richie and Faith are obviously freezing as they frolick in the pool but luckily playing pool basketball encourages a great deal of skin-on-skin action. Richie loves that Faith is so competitive but can have a laugh as well.
“She dominated,” he says with a straight face.
They have a chat about love, family, morals and stuff.
“Yeah, I really like you,” he tells her, then they go the pash.
She returns to the house clutching a rose, telling the others “I don’t kiss and tell”. Faith seems more low maintenance than some of the other girls.
The group date begins and the Keira is relieved to learn it’s not going to be as strenuous as last time’s sumo roller derby date. But Bacon Girl, aged 25, is worried to learn the nature of the date: “I twerk; I don’t do ballroom dancing.” C’mon – don’t make me change your name from Bacon Girl to Miley Cyrus.
Osher reminds us that Richie showed his breakdancing skills in The Bachelorette but, sadly, does not call for a demo. Missed opportunity, Oshie!
Sophie the invisible brunette is getting camera time, so she’s a goner. The girls learn there will be a dance off and the winner gets more time with Bachie. First, they have to pick a partner and stupidly no-one goes near Richie, so Keira swoops in. But apparently she has a sore arm (presumably from the roller derbying) so can’t hold her waltz frame properly. The other girls are appropriately sympathetic. “She just needs to toughen up,” Mean Girl Rachael tells the camera.
After some practising with each other, the girls get to sit to one side like wallflowers, watching longingly as, one by one, they waltz with Richie.
Surprisingly Olena, who carries herself with such poise, is a rubbish dancer. “Watching Olena is hilarious. She is just awkward and unco,” Kaira laughs to camera.
Keira is last to dance and does her moves hamming it up sultrily. She is picked as the winner by the producers – ahem – Richie.
Her prize is a dress that is apparently worth $6500 but looks like Spotlight was having a special on bulk buys of black and white tulle.
She has to walk down the staircase in the giant dress and it’s obvious they didn’t know what to do with her hair. Why not slick it back?
Most of the girls say nice things … Most.
“She just to me doesn’t look like Cinderella – more like the Wicked Witch,” says Mean Girl Rachael to camera. I wonder if Rachael knows she’s the secret villain of the show or if, like Princess Emily last year, she’s oblivious? Keira knows she’s a villain and relishes her role.
Keira and Richie head outside for a horse and carriage ride and Keira does a hilarious royal wave to the others, who head back to the house to prank the other contestants that Keira was sent packing.
Sadly they crack and tell the truth straight away, and speculation turns to whether Keira’s demeanour on the date will be better than usual.
“What – crying, whingeing, complaining?” quips Georgia. But Marja – beautiful, invisible Marja the yoga teacher and actress – sticks up for her: “You’d be surprised – there’s a softer side to Keira and I think that that will come out if Richie’s alone with her.”
Meanwhile, Richie and Keira are dancing in a fairy light-strewn garden to the tune of a string quartet. She’s a graceful dancer.
As usual, the girls have been herded into the kitchen to await the return of the datee, and Keira twirls her gown to reveal she got a rose.
She seems happy with how things went, until singer Eliza speaks.
“Keira, I’m so happy for you, darling,” she starts, then takes her to task in a mild tone for seeming ungrateful to be spending time with Richie earlier. Have I been watching too much UnREAL or did a producer tell Eliza to poke the bear in return for more air time?
It escalates from there and Keira walks out. The others avoid eye contact.
It’s cocktail party time and Sophie is saying she reckons she’s safe, so she’s definitely gone.
Alex is dithering over the white rose while Eliza is getting angsty over not having cleared the air with Keira. Kiki tells her to chill while Noni, forgetting – or not caring – there are 10 cameras on her, readjusts her boobs so they are sitting more comfortable in her strappy dress.
Eliza insists on trying to apologise to Keira despite repeatedly being asked to leave it for another time. OMG – what is Mean Girl Rachael wearing?
What’s with all the chokers, halter necks and weird scarves this season? Rachael tells Alex she can’t use the white rose until she herself has chatted with Richie. Just kidding – ha ha – but if you do I will totally kill you – just kidding … Sleep with one eye open, Alex.
Alex sheds a little tear as she lets Rachael grab Richie, wistfully waiting for Richie to come to her rather than play the white rose.
And it’s goodbye to brunettes Sophie and Marja, who seemed kind.
Sophie hugs Richie and whispers: “Look after Nikki.” (Indeed, Nikki was looking a bit shell-shocked at the cocktail party – perhaps she’s just realising he could be pashing a lots of girls). at least you won’t have to wear this dress again, Sophie. Bye, Marja.
Next week It looks like Alex finally gets a single date with Richie and she’s so in lurrve and she’s going to lock him in her cellar forever and ever, while the other girls get those fake babies they use to try and scare American teenagers into abstinence. This could be fun.
Presumably the ones who didn’t get airtime last night are the sane ones. Here’s a name refresher for you (but of course Natalie and Aimee are goneski and Vintaea bailed). So we didn’t really see Sophie, Mia, Tolyna, Faith and just glimpses of Kiki and Laura.
There’s a bit on Swear Bear Vintaea who obviously never watched the show before here
Again, Rosie from Mamamia does the best Bachelor recaps – they are usually posted soon after the show ends at mamamia
It’s day 2 (more like day 5) and the girls are hanging around the house in their casual resort gear and most look so much better without all the spack filler and sequins.
Osher drops off the date cards and it’s WA girl Nikki of the white hair (whom we met first in the premiere had the super high split). The others are totes jelly, especially when Richie turns up in a helicopter to pick her up – Channel 10 are blowing the budget early. How are they going to offered to pay their candle bill?
As they fly near the Sydney Harbour Bridge Nikki professes a fear of heights, so that will be exploited later in the show. The chopper drops them off at a secluded beach and then it’s into a row boat for a getting-to-know you convo. And just to remind us Richie is a true blue Aussie, he utters “crikey!” at one point.
Back at the mansion the girls are chilling outside when Kiki appears with a date card, revealing the names Sasha, (Snickers Faux Villain Keira: “She’ll be hilarious on a group date. Really loud – she’ll annoy the other girls. Heh, heh.”) Tolyna, Faith (wow – she is still wearing a lot of makeup and favours the American cheerleader look), artist Georgia, talentless singer Eliza, white rose holder Alex, another white haired girl called Laura, Kiki, former athlete Mia and Keira. Upon this, Keira utters what looks to be an “urgh” and looks like she just ate a dirty street pie. “I don’t like it,” she says at the thought of having to share the limelight. The dateless ones aren’t pleased with her reaction.
Under-the-radar villain Rachael aka Regina George tells the camera: “We’re here to date him – we’re not here to sit back and just chill out and get a tan in the backyard. I suppose she did really want a one-on-one date but we can’t always get what we want in life.”
On the first date, Richie and Nikki are having a dip in the ocean and pretending to splash each other. Nikki looks so much better with her white blonde hair all wet and tousled. The producers make poor Richie open up an already de-husked coconut with a machete for reasons I don’t understand. Real estate agent Nikki spills she was engaged to a guy she was with for 12 years. So, she’s 28 and they broke up a year ago, so she must have been 15 when they got together. She tells Richie she’s never been on a real date before. He seems to really like her, so out comes the rose and … First pash to Nikki.
Back at the mansion the girls have been gathered to await Nikki’s return. Rachael thinks they won’t have kissed. Poor, deluded Rachael. Nikki says she just gave him a peck.
Nine girls arrive for the group date and it looks like they stopped at the tanning salon on the way because everyone but Eliza has Oompa Loompa-coloured legs. There’s a lot of cut-off denim and biker jackets. The girls are split into smaller groups for a retro-style photo shoot and Alex is the only one who doesn’t have to share her shoot with another girl. Keira and Russian Sasha are teamed up for a milkshake shoot.
We keep hearing about what a big character Kiki is but we haven’t seen it until now, when she walks out rocking her her 1950s leopard print swimsuit like a Playboy bunny.
Richie looks like he got a bit sunburnt on the beach date and Faith proves to be gormless yet flirtatious, comparing her modelling style to that of a potato.
Sasha works hard to ruin Keira’s photoshoot and Keira is rather meek about it – and obviously rattled.
On the next shoot Eliza is loving the dance shoot, pulling out all her dance moves. The other girls on the shoot are dying to get some time with Richie but no one wants to tackle Eliza to the grand to do it.
For the final shoot Richie is dressed like a T-bird and he and Alex get to sit in a gorgeous red Cadillac. Afterwards Richie says he got a few butterflies: “I was like: Be smooth, Richie, be smooth.”
The other girls come out to watch them giggling at each other. Sasha drily says: “Imagine how pretty their babies will be.”
The photographer makes them pretend to kiss while Keira provides sarcastic commentary just metres away.
Here we go again, showing how cool Richie is by having him rock up on a motorbike for another date. “Oh my god he’s so bad boy,” purrs Georgia. He’s there to pick up Olena the mysterious Ukrainian. She’s a 23-year-old make-up artist who has had a string of disastrous dates. “We have nothing to talk about or he sets my hair on fire … that’s another story,” she tells the camera.
They go for a ride and she asks him some not-so-superficial questions about his family and future kids, fearful she won’t get another chance. He gives the usual “kids, eventually” answer.
Richie takes her back to his bachie pad.
“That’s my sleeping quarters – wait to you see that,” he tells her. Cue both of them cracking up. They go for a swim in one of his many pools even though it looks like they are freezing. She’s luring him in with her mysterious eyes again. He says he has another surprise for her but it’s not a rose: it’s a figure-hugging red dress that she puts on and rocks – the other girls are going to die.
“I feel like you challenge me a little but, which is great,” he tells her, and hands her a rose.
Back at the mansion the girls have started drinking already and there are dress splits galore. Nikki from the first date has a full-one J-Lo plunging neckline green dress on but it’s too short.
Richie takes Nikki off for a chat but then Alex appears clutching the white rose, looking mischievous. Some of the girls are confused as to the white rose’s power. “It’s like an unlimited packet of Tim Tams – it never stops,” Kiki succinctly explains to Georgia, who may be too young to get the reference to the genie ad.
At least Alex waits til he finishes his chat before revealing the rose, and he whisks her off to his dungeon, which is stuffed full of cushions, candles and Moroccan lamps. They share a passion for dirt bikes and realises their relationship will never work because he barracks for West Coast and she’s a Collingwood girl (carn the Pies!).
Keira is super cranky about the white rose, whereas Megan the diving chick sensibly says they would all have done the same.
Alex finally gets to have an in-depth talk with Richie about her son. “I feel just on CLoud Nine and nothing could dampen that feeling,” she says after their chat. And then she sits on a couch near Keira.
“You disappointed me personally,” Keira tells her. “I’ve said it behind your back and I’m telling it to your face.”
Alex doesn’t seem rattled: “I’m going to go to sleep tonight knowing that I’m a good person.” By this point a few of the girls have snuck away, over all the drama. And it just escalates from there.
Finally, one of the other girls encourages Alex to walk away, depriving us of the chance for a glass of wine to be thrown of someone. Can we hurry up already with the rose ceremony>
The rose ceremony
Oh god, Nikki’s green dress is just so wrong. Either cover up the chest or the legs – don’t flash both. God, Tiffany aka plank girl looks totally different to last night, as does Sophie the Mary Louise Parker lookalike, who gets her first bit of airtime, so she’s a goner. Oh – actually, she’s safe, so it’s white hair Laura and former athlete Mia who are goneski, off to watch Osher’s Australian Idol clips.
Later in the season
We get a lengthy montage of clips from upcoming episodes and it looks like Keira is around for a while as we see her in various outfits. And it looks like Richie does lots of pashing. I didn’t want to watch it too closely as it seemed to give a lot away.
And here’s a still from early in the episode. Megan would rather eat Nutella from a jar than get in a chopper with Richie.
Here are the Bachelorettes vying for Richie’s heart. My, that’s a lot of boobage there. An article on news.com.au gives you the lowdown on each contestant here
They are aged 23 to 31.
I quite like the answer of massage therapist Vintea, 25:
Why did you apply? “I didn’t have a high school formal so I thought I could finally get the chance to wear a gorgeous dress. Kidding! I wanted to put myself out there, challenge myself to see if I could do it.”
Why should Richie choose you? “I am pretty honest and upfront so I feel that is good point of myself. I’m ambitious, hardworking, kind, strong and smart.”
Channel 10 has announced the new Bachelor and it’s …. drum roll … Richie!
Yep, Richie the rope access technician who didn’t win Sam’s heart – despite being hilarious on the date where they donned old person makeup – and who we all thought was not polished enough to be cast as the next Bachie.
Hopefully having done the show once he’ll calm down a bit and be less nervous.
btw his Insta feed directs enquiries to a modelling agency, which offers this info:
HEIGHT: 6’2″ / 187CM HAIR: BLOND EYE: BLUE CHEST: 41½”/106CM WAIST: 33″ /84CM COLLAR: 16½”/41C
So if any sewing enthusiasts want to whip him up a shirt, you now have his measurements.
