Tag: Tyson

MKR – it’s the end!

It’s been a three-month slog but finally the end of My Kitchen Rules is nigh. Tonight Amy and Tyson face Valerie and Other Courtney in the grand final.
It seems a given that the brother and sister pairing will win, as they cook Modern Australian cheffy-type food, whereas mum and daughter’s Indian cuisine is delicious but doesn’t have the same impact presentation-wise.
However, they could well achieve success with their own range of sauces or meal kits if Coles jumps on board. Their bottled soz sold out in 24 hours and Coles must have been happy, as they’ve released a second batch of it. Or perhaps a publisher will want to print “Poppy’s book”.


MKR starts at 7.45pm on Seven (the House Rules premiere is before it) and goes until 10pm.
I’ll put up a new poll so you can vote for the winner.***
Here we go … finally, at 8pm.
We rip through the montage of times past and thank god, because it only serves to remind us of how mediocre some teams were.
The teams enters Kitchen HQ and it’s like they’ve stumbled on to the set of Survivor tribal council. There are urns shooting out flames everywhere.
Amy and Ty are in black, which usually means they won’t win. Manu is wearing a snazzy black velvet suit with a diamond pattern. Pete is not wearing his trademark blue. I know it’s a big night, but he looks better in blue.

They are making:
Parmesan and truffle mousse with mushies.
Pea and ham soup
Butter-poached marron with Jerusalem artichoke and rhubarb
Veal, sweetbreads and marron
After Dinner Mint

Mum and Other Court are cooking:
Samosa crisp with chaat
Salmon tikka skewers
Spiced Spanish mackerel with kichdi (Val describes it as an Indian risotto)
Pork vindaloo
Pistachio kulfi

I bought a ham hock today, so bring on the soup, Amy and Tyson – give me some tips! They are using fresh peas from punnets that have already been shelled – never seen that before.
White team’s chaat seems to be chickpeas with some spices. Unless they cooked the chickpeas in a pressure cooker and we didn’t see it, they came from a can. Hmmm. Will the judges give them a hard time, a la the Beardies and Pretzelgate? I’m looking at you, Guy Grossi and Liz Egan (aka The Other One).
I do enjoy Amy stirring her brother and making him call her “Chef”. Nothing beats sibling humour.
An hour in the families arrive and the tears start flowing. Aw, Amy and Ty’s folks are delightfully normal, but it’s the moustache belonging to what seems to be their brother that is mesmerising. It’s been waxed and twisted to peak stiffness. #MyMoustacheRules
Speaking of hashtags, here comes you know who, followed by the other teams.

Amy and Ty are using white truffle, which on truffletraders.com.au sells for $700 for 100g. Regular truffle is only about $200. Amy is running on pure adrenaline.


All the forgettable teams have been grouped together, including the Desperate Housewives of Wollongong, the young chicks and the mild-mannered Asian brothers. That’s enough of you lot – let’s see more of the midwife in the electric blue dress that has vines sprouting from thr neckline, threatening to strangle her.


Entree is served …
Both look good but I reckon that samosa sack could be a bit tricky to eat – will the disc shatter when cut into?
Guy says it’s a “zingy little number”. Manu’s tastebuds are dancing.
Colin says A&T’s mousse packs a flavour punch. Pete loves it but wants something a little crispy for texture.

So, believe it or not, some people are actually watching The Voice while MKR is on. I’m not one of them but there’s a lot of social media chat about this girl, so have a look if you need a musical break. She’s rather good – and only 15!

Back in the kitchen, it’s on to course two and for the judges to visit each team and put the wind up them by mentioning that each is cooking pea soup. “Umm, I’m just going to go and grab some garam masala,” jokes Amy. Have I mentioned how much I like Amy?
Valerie and Other Court have obviously spent a lot of time working out the presentation of their dishes, balancing a mini salmon tikka skewer on a shotglass of soup, with something crunchy on the side for texture. The vibrancy of A&T’s pea soup in the dark bowls is stunning.

Course two is served ….

(Thank god I’m recording this because every ad I fast forward seems to feature the Hashtaggers flogging something).
Colin loves their refinement of peasant-style ingredients. The fried pork back fat is a winner. Pete says it’s faultless.
The Indian-style pea soup is, according to Karen, delicious and pleasant.

Time to cook course three …
Ty tells us how to cook marron and I hope Duck Nutter from last year is watching, given he served uncooked marron last year. OMG – Josh is on the sidelines talking about how to cook marron. MKR editors, are you trying to make me turn over to Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2? That’s how much I want his face to be off my TV screen. And now he is criticising A&T’s choice of a rhubarb accompaniment.
The girls are using finger lime with their mackerel, which is very Mod Oz. But they are having dramas with uncooked fish. That gets resolved but their plating is rushed and they are frazzled. Courtney tears up a bit, as her lovely Dad gives her encouraging thumbs ups from the sidelines.

Course three is served …
Guy says the marron was cooked properly. Liz has never had anything like it and is “thrilled”. The like the rhubarb.
The soz with the mackerel is a knockout, says Pete. Guy wanted less rice, less fish and more soz.

Time for course four …
Have I been pronouncing vindaloo incorrectly for decades? Or is it a regional thing. I haven’t heard “vindar-loo” before.
While the teams cook, see how many of these contestants you can name:

A&T’s dish is, as per usual, very cheffy, using offal and bone marrow. Valerie shows the crowd she has a photo of her late father in her pocket. Oh dear – that started the tears. It’s great that they love him so much and he was obviously a fabulous cook but we’ve seen far too much of this – and the editors are to blame, not Valerie and Courtney. The dead relative edit just annoys viewers.
V&C are happy with their vindaloo soz.


Why is Amy putting the jus on using a spoon? Tip it in a jug! This could be one of those times we hear the old “stress on a plate”. Hopefully it taste great.

Course four is served …
They love the vindaloo and condiments. “Confident”, “superb’.
We get a lingering shot of Pete’s wobbling bone marrow (no, that is not a euphemism). Colin says the dish is chef standard. Karen tops him by saying it’s the best dish she’s eaten in eight years of MKR.

Time for the final course …
All seems well with A&T’s dessert but then Ty gets the shakes as he tries to quenelle the cremeaux and it’s hard to watch.
The kulfi looks good. It can often be too sweet, but V&C are smart to enough to know this and would have balanced their flavours accordingly. The tart berries will help. The processes used are not as complicated in A&T’s dessert but Ty does push teh edge with his flavours sometimes.

The judges taste …
Liz says the After Dinner Mint is faultless. Colin: “This dish made me happy.” (And now I’m popping to the fridge to hunt for chocolate.)


The kulfi dish is playful, says Karen. It’s refreshing. But no-one calls its faultless.

Are we there yet? After two hours of this I’m starting to fade … Surely A&T have won, even if they are wearing black?
It was good at least to have a grand final without a “bad guy” (remember Lauren and Carmine, Chloe and Kelly). And one in which no-one cooked bad food.

The judges speak …
This is usually just a repeat of the chat we hear as they taste. Urgh – we have to sit through the teams being asked about their journeys. Get to the scores!
I’m thinking mostly 9s for the ladies and a mix of 9s and 10s for A&T.

Valerie and Courtney
Karen 9, Guy 9, Colin 8, (yeah, Amy and Tyson have sooo got this), Liz 9, Manu 8, Pete 9. 52/60

Amy and Tyson
Colin 9, Guy 9, Manu 9, Karen 10, Liz 10, Pete 10.

Here comes the glitter confetti. Pity we know they film two alternate endings. Ah, Tyson says some lovely things about his sis and she gives him a loving punch in the arm.

Well done, Amy and Tyson!

(Now, thank god that’s over. Bring on MasterChef!)



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MKR Tues – Semi Final 1

In the first My Kitchen Rules semi final, it’s Amy and Tyson versus the Hashtaggers. #GoAmyandTyson! Is anyone out there actually supporting the Hashtaggers?
Promo here.

I expect to see some great food from Amy and Tyson tonight (and a few good dishes from the Hashtaggers but an ordinary dessert) so I am preparing myself for a banquet of umami delights by eating a snack pack of cheese Twisties.
I am just going to fast forward the flashbacks of the producers trying to make Tyson look angry and Amy weird, when in fact they are both charming and funny – and good cooks. And I don’t need to hear any more hashtags. Let’s cook!
(But first, Manu is looking sharp in a midnight blue (or it could be black) velvet jacket with satin lapels.) Oh no – they are asking the contestants about their dreams and David tears up. Ick. I’m worried I will hear the word “journey” next.
How can Betty see to cook through those falsies? I kind of hope an eyelash drops into the pot.
Hashtaggers are cooking Vietnamese sugarcane prawns for entree (yum!). They have some monster prawns to work with. Main is twice-cooked pork belly with pumpkin puree and nashi pear. (Yum and not too complicated). Dessert is mango sorbet with sticky rice. (The tastiest sounding of all their deserts, but again, sounds rather simple).
A&T squab with kale, almonds and onion cream. Amy: “These squab are nice and fresh – you can tell by their eyeballs.” A sentence I guarantee has never before been uttered on MKR. Main is duck and turnips. Ooh, cryptic but I do love a dish where they don’t list all the ingredients – makes it easier to cover up mistakes if an element goes pear shaped.
Dessert is Pimm’s and ginger jelly with cucumber sorbet (sounds a bit like their G&T pear dessert from their last IR.
Now Amy is popping the decapitated squab heads in the oven to roast for a soz – love it!
Uh oh – Amy forgot about her soz and it’s look rather dark and gloopy. Then there are the usual last-minute plating dramas.
Hashtaggers are happy but their plates are massive – looks more like a main than an entree, especially with that jumble or vermicelli plonked on the side.

Side note: Last year at this time the final four were Tasia and Gracia, Jordan and Anna, Zana and Plus One and Carmine and Lauren.

Time to judge
Finally, we get to see Colin Fassnidge again, plus the other usual suspects.
Manu is sucking the meat off the bones of his squab. Colin is very impressed (and you know he’s usually the harshest critic) and the others agree.
Karen says the prawn dish is superb. They all love it.
So the teams seem even but I reckon A&T will get bonus points for restrained elegance.

Mains
For main, A&T is doing turnip three ways: pickled, mashed (with potato) and confit. It’s very MasterCheffy and I think the judges will be impressed. I’m not a huge fan of turnip but it’s one of those poorly regarded vegies chefs love. They are also doing duck two ways.
Hashtaggers have put quartered butternut pumpkins in the oven and are wondering why they haven’t cooked enough for them to puree it. Umm – smaller chunks and/or microwave, guys! There’s some debate over whether their soz is balanced – foreshadowing?
Their crackle isn’t puffing so they chuck it in a frypan of oil and seem happy. Ty’s duck skin has gone floppy while resting so he chucks them skin side down back in the pan, with most of their plating up still to go. Amy is getting frustrated with him. That duck is going to be overcooked! They’d better hope Hashtaggers have stuffed up their soz.

Time to judge
Karen says the duck is a good dish and took a lot of work. Colin loved the duck leg but Pete thinks they could have left the duck breast off altogether. Guy says it’s only 30 seconds to a minute over.
The judges think the pork could have been slightly more cooked and the soz is too sweet.They all love the idea of pickling the nashi in kimchi. Manu looks confused. He likes the elements but not necessarily together.
So, A&T must be pulling ahead.

Dessert
On the sidelines, Mum and Daughter are watching A&T make a dessert out of a couple of cucumbers. “I don’t like to experiment,” says daughter. And that’s why you won’t win – as delicious are your curries are.
Ooh – I thought Hashtaggers’ sticky rice was going to be black. Must be getting my countries mixed up.
Ty is segmenting oranges and swearing heaps. I’m with you, Ty – it’s such a fiddly job for so little reward.
I like the look of Betty’s fried tuile – will have to look up how she made it.
A&T have a lot of elements in their dessert. As Manu says: “It could be danger.”
Hashtaggers have obviously worked hard on plating up their desserts in a modern fashion. It looks more refined than A&T’s dish.

The judges taste
The judges like the Hashtaggers’ contrast of sweet and salty flavours but Karen says the rice has dried out a bit. Colin loves the soz.
A&T’s dish is fragrant and gets a wow from Pete but there are some wincing faces around the table. Pete loved a previous sour dessert A&T made but, of course, to draw out the suspense we have to wait for the judges’ public comments to find out what’s what.

The judges’ verdict
Hashtaggers
Colin gives their sugarcane prawns his “dish of the day”.
Karen 8 Liz 8 AKA That Other One Guy 8 Colin 9 Pete 8 (with a wink) Manu 8


A&T
They get praise but the judges hated the big slices of pickled cuke in the dessert as it was a mouthful of vinegar.
Karen 9 Liz 8 Guy 9 Colin 8 Pete 9 Manu 8.

Phew – and all is right with the world. Amy and Tyson are in the grand final.



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MKR – finally, a public challenge

Hooray – some of the dregs are gone and tonight on My Kitchen Rules we get to see teams actually cooking in public. No more instant restaurants – for a while, at least. Thank god for that.
Tonight they get to cook for what looks like the Nippers of a surf lifesaving club. Cooking in a sandy environment with the sun beating down on them could make for frayed tempers.
The promo makes it seem that Amy and Uber Tyson come a cropper, so they are probably perfectly safe.



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MKR – sudden death

It’s sudden death time … No, Tyson hasn’t stabbed a Hashtagger with his fork (now that WOULD be a massive twist) – it’s time for the bottom two teams to cook off to secure a place in the competition.


Surely the Hashtaggers have got this over the WA Flirty Vet and The Pale One (sorry, I know your name is Ash but the old MKR Ash is currently on I’m a Celeb and I can only have one Ash cooking on my TV each year. Although some might sew Newbie Ash ain’t cooking).
Here come the judges (yay – it’s Colin Fassnidge) and Karen Martini is looking rather sultry in a leather skirt with a thigh split and BIG hair.

COOKING BEGINS
For entree Flirty Vet’s team are cooking mushroom crepes with brie sauce. Is it the 1970s? Main is venison on black rice pilaf with Cumberland soz (usually made with redcurrants). So not a French theme, then. Biscotti with pistachio ice cream and lemon curd. So French, English/Asian and Italian? It’s not very fresh sounding.
Hashtaggers are doing a Lao raw beef salad, steamed fish wrapped in banana leaf, chilli salt fruits with with green mango and pineapple sorbet. Sounds yum and I’m intrigued by the chilli salt fruits.
Now they are talking about how important it is not to burn the crackling, and you know what that means … And Pale One and the judges are talking about how nutmeg can be overpowering, and you now what that means …
Pale One is aiming to make a thin crepe that’s “nice and fluffy”. Hmm, can’t say I’ve ever had a fluffy crepe. They have chosen a very labour intensive dish – not good time management.
I’m enjoying Tyson and Amy’s commentary on the sidelines. “Hashtag, burning the rice,” says our favourite Uber driver/serial killer as the Hashtaggers get off to a rocky start.


(Side note: What’s with Manu’s old man purple paisley tie? Did he borrow it from 2016 contestant Chops?)
Poor New Ash just loves cranking pans up to a high heat. She did it with their crucified fish the other day and now she’s burning crepes.


But it’s ok, Hashtaggers (Channel 7 keep trying to get “The Hustlers” to stick but I’m not having it) have burnt rice AND crackling.
Flirty is talking about how she likes the flavour of her sauce because it taste like brie. Flirty, no-one wants to eat a puddle of brie, though.
Hashtaggers’ dish looks inviting with lots of vibrant colours.

ENTREE IS SERVED
The judges like it but it needs more dressing (which we knew was coming because Betty mentioned it didn’t need more).
Tassie bloke Damo – supposedly one of the best home cooks in the country -has never eaten raw beef.
Colin calls the crepe “beige”. Ouch! It’s simple, it’s a pancake rather than a crepe and there’s too much nutmeg.

COOKING MAINS
“We want your mentos in one oww-er,” yells Manu. New Ash is putting a lot of stuff into her pilaf, including more mushrooms (when they just had a mushroom entree) and craisins, which are mostly sugar and more of a confectionary than real dried fruit.
Hashtaggers are pushing it to get their fish in banana leaf parcels in the steamer on time. On the sidelines, Amy points out the steamer has been overfilled and the fish may not cook properly. This is what happens when people practise by cooking for six people, not 12.
Hashtaggers are trying to do too many things at once and have forgotten a key element. Tyson: “Hashtag, where’s my rice?” The girls are worried their venison will be too rare for the judges but that’s how it should be. Hashtaggers are just chucking stuff on a plate in a bid to get something out.

MAINS ARE SERVED
Karen’s fish, garlic and ginger were raw, while Guy and Liz’s was perfectly cooked but the spices aren’t balanced.
You can tell the girls’ meat wasn’t rested properly because it’s bled all over the plate. Guy says the venison is perfect but the soz is a bit too sweet. Manu would have preferred the black rice without the soz poured over it (sacrilege from Manu!).

COOKING DESSERT
Bek (aka Flirty Vet) is worried her biscotti is too chewy. Perhaps that’s because she’s cut the slices really thickly. Just bung it back in the oven, Bek, and stop flirting with Brown Beard. You could well be safe as Hashtaggers are losing their minds and serving another savoury dessert. I know that’s a thing with Asian desserts but this was their chance to put their own spin on it to without shocking the Western palate. David has a little cry at the end of it and even Betty looks teary.

DESSERT IS SERVED
“Hooley dooley,” says Karen as she tastes the tart green mango sorbet but she wanted more fish sauce caramel to tie it together. Pete calls it “unique”, but he means it in a good way. Manu says it’s too tart for him and there’s a lot of face pulling as people taste it. Liz says it’s fun and challenging to eat – also in a good way.
Guy likes the biscotti. The ice cream was nice but not very pistachioey. Colin has a go at them for only using a blob of curd. Liz wonders if biscotti and ice cream classifies as dessert.

THE SCORES
Hashtaggers David and Betty
Karen 6 Liz 5 Guy 6 Colin 5 Pete 6 Manu 6 (can we just adopt the Colin method of scoring, now? “Good, bad, good.”
Total: 34/60

WA Flirt Bek and New Ash
(But first, Manu reminds them they served mushroom “crap” for entree.) Karen 5 Liz 5 Guy 6 Colin 4 Pete 5 Manu 6 Colin: “You had some good elements on every dish, but not every dish was good.)
Total: 31/60
The judges have been quite kind in their comments tonight (unless we didn’t see the bad). Cue sad piano music and the girls have a little cry. Brown Beard wipes his eyes and the editors are thrilled to be able to pretend a man wiping sweat out of his eyes is tears for a lost love.

So the Hashtaggers live on to continue their villainy. They are going to have to sort out their time management if they are to go much further in the comp.

SUNDAY NIGHT
It’s the new round of contestants and it looks like we have some mild-mannered brothers cooking for a dearly departed mum, a crier and a new master villain – or two.



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