Tag: Kylie

Australian Survivor – Mon, Oct 3 – Jennah Louise make the edit

It seems like Nick was voted out ages ago, but in Survivor time it was just a few minutes. Back at camp besties Lee and Sam don’t hide their contempt for him, which just makes them look like tools who need to move on when they are still in the game and the so-called snake is gone.
Magic Matt ponders over some of the bombs Nick threw at tribal council, when he knew he was going home, including that Matt is at the bottom of is alliance.
Holy moley – Jennah Louise is talking! She and Matt whisper about the accuracy of the truth bombs and Matt agrees Nick was right about “the group and the fractions”. Yeah, how bout those fractions! Matt is feeling a little lonely and is reminded of his school days, having no BFF. Aww – lucky you are now a cool magician, Matt.
Flick goes into damage control mode the next day and flat out lies to Sue: “I’m not in an alliance with Brooke and El.” Geez, Flick – even Sue will be able to see through that. She tries to get Sue to join her posse with the girls and the muscle bros. Which leaves Matt, Kylie, JL and Kristie on the outs. Sue says she’s in, but she’s not fooled: “Not in a fit would I take any orders from Flick, Brooke or El … but I’m in a very weak position here, and I have to lay down dead dog for a bit.”
Sure, play dead dog, Sue (and did you see how bruised her poor knees were>), but even better would be to ally with the other outcasts so it’s 5-5.
I really want to see a tie at tribal so we can have a fire-making competition.
Flick and Brooke have Matt in their sights, as he’s now paranoid and acting weird. Cut to Matt wearing jeans that have been cut into shorts, but he’s still wearing the bottom part of the jeans as leg warmers.
(And look – I tweeted about it and the official SurvivorAU account replied with this!)


Brooke would prefer Kylie gone as she’s a physical threat but she’s letting emotion get the better of her – Kylie is a physical threat but she has no social or strategic game.
Case in point: Kylie still thinks she’s in alliance with Brooke, Flick and Sam.
We are getting a lot of talking heads from Matt tonight, saying how his weakness is wanting people to like him. You and everyone, Matt. I hope you can make it through but the amount of camera time you are getting worries me.
OMG – JL is speaking again! “I’m ready to make big moves,” she says. Yes, JL – please, finally, can someone not let the majority alliance trample them without organising an opposing alliance that’s not a complete shambles.

Challenge time
We get a “Come on in, guys” from JLap, who has a chat about how well the girls are doing at challenges. This one is a three parter with people eliminated after each section
JLap warns that the first four out of the challenge face some consequence, but doesn’t say what.
Kylie, El, Brooke, Sam, JL and Kristie are first across the balance beam section.
JLap tells losers Matt, Sue, Lee and Flick: “You are leaving immediately for Exile Beach.” What! They won’t return until tribal council. So it’s a mini version of Exile Island. It’s a twist that will probably see Matt voted out, as the outcasts what have time to band together – unless someone stands up at council and does the “I’m voting Brooke” thing.
The next part of the challenge involves crawling across a wildly rocking bridge ladder. JL, Brooke and El make it and most then try and knock balls into baskets with a giant stick. And JL wins! Now she’s guaranteed some camera time. Well done.


At Exile Beach
Matt, Sue, Lee and Flick arrive at Exile Beach to find this sign: “You have been exiled but just within reach, immunity is hidden here at Exile Beach … You have until sundown.”
Does this spark a Cagayan-style idol scramble? Seems unlikely. Flick does a lot of talking about how idols just make people targets and seems to have convinced everyone not to look for it. Unlike Exile Island is Survivor seasons past, this beach seems well supplied with coconuts and shade and they’ve been given what looks to be machete and flint.
Flick and Lee have a quick chat about who their alliance could be voting for. Flick: “What do you think?” Lee: (Silence.) Flick: “What did El say?” Lee: “Matt.”
Come on, Lee, it’s Survivor – you have to strategise at some time.
Back at camp they fool Kylie and Kristie into thinking Sue is going, even though why on earth would you get rid of Sue so early when she’s not a challenge threat? Sure, if she makes it all the way to the end she could win but they still have the numbers and Sue has shown she’s not one to build her own alliances.


Tribal Council
The winners enter and then the exiles. I wish the exiles had played with everyone’s minds by rocking up wearing yellow fabric bracelets, but it was not to be.
The first member of the jury, Nick, enters, and he looks very different clean shaven and about 10 years younger.


JLap’s questions tonight are pretty much a rehash of everything Nick said at the previous tribal council about who’s on top.
And then the questions turn to morality and values, which is where Australian Survivor is differing greatly to US Survivor.
Sue: “I always pull myself back because my family are watching and I don’t want to be a bad example to children and my grandchildren.”
I really hope we get a second season of Australian Survivor because we’d get some very differently gameplay.

The votes
We see Sue vote for Kylie and vice versa. Sue, Sue, Kylie, Sue, Kylie, Kylie, Kylie, Kylie and it’s Kylie.
She’s gracious in her exit.

Next time: JL tries to make a move with Kristie. Yes!
And: A grinning Kylie tells the camera she knew she was going and says Brooke is in charge and there needs to be an uprising: “You’ve got to start to play at some stage,” says the person who repeatedly ignored opportunities to do just that.



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Australian Survivor – Sun, Sept 25

Finally – a real merge – not just a shuffle. The fallout from this is going to be fun.

It’s Day 32 already – the days just fly by when Survivor is on three nights a week.
At yellow, Conner, Kristie and Kate are wasting away. They are going to go nuts and get so sick when they finally get that merge feast.
Everyone heads in to what they think is a challenge and the fans quickly realise the seating indicates it’s the Survivor auction – yay!
There are gasps as blue realise that Phoebe is gone.
The editors play sad music as Kate speaks about how many players their tribe lost and the camera cuts to Conner and Kristie.
JLap starts talking about how hard it’s been, laying down the adjectives and the contestants get restless as some of them twig he’s about to announce the merge. Except Spidey Sam, who says: “What’s going on here?”
Meanwhile, Nick is happily chanting: “Say it! Say it!”
Yes, it’s the merge (the real one) and they are now all competing as individuals, with new black buffs.


They get $500 to spend and can bid in $20 increments. There’s no sharing of money or food, which I know is standard in US Survivor these days but it would have been kind of interesting to let the Aussies do it to see where the alliances lie. Usually with the auction, the people who are playing hard will save all their pennies as the final item is usually an advantage or clue to an idol – or occasionally letters from loved ones. This makes me think Nick and Magic Matt won’t be buying any food and we’ll see who else is in it to win it. Plus with a merge they usually get a feast, so hanging out a few more hours won’t hurt the former blues, who have enjoyed many helpings of Hungry Jack’s and a Samoan feast.

The auction begins
First up is salt and vinegar chips and a cola. El makes first bid but Conner is the only other bidder – poor kid – he must be starving. JLap reveals Conner gets and extra three softies, which go to Kristie and Kate and his old tribemate Sue. Aww, he’s a good kid.
Next is chocolate cake and choc milk. El bids $60 but is immediately outbid by Conner with $440!! That’s his whole stash gone. Fair enough, kid – he knew he didn’t have enough money for a clue so made sure he got some food. That cake is going to make him so crook.
Next it’s the old secret item trick. It’s going to be a bowl of rice. Sam bids $240 (after Nick drives up the price in what looks like a deliberate move). JLap does the old “but do you want it or this other covered item?”. He sticks with the original and it’s nachos and a margherita. But we don’t even see what was under the other hessian cloche.
The following item is also covered and the keen players sense it’s something special. Nick, Brooke, Lee and Sue all place bids. Sue for $220 gets steak and chips.
Up next is a hot bath with a toothbrush and toothpaste. Brooke gets it for $20 and has to hop in in front of everyone.
Next is what they’ve been waiting for: an advantage. El and Lee bid for it. Magic Matt stays quiet, knowing these advantages can come back to bite you.
Kate for $500 buys spag bol and a red wine, so expect to see her topple of the bench.
The final item is covered and Nick outbids Lee for $440. He has won an advantage and he doesn’t look too happy. “I didn’t want this … I didn’t want a big, fat target on my back – that’s what that is.”


Too right, Nick. The advantage holders will open their scrolls back at camp. If I was Nick I’d do it in front of everyone and read it aloud. Lee may get away with doing it secretly as everyone trusts him.

They all return to their new home beach and everyone’s sad to learn they are at the crappy yellow camp, with the comforts of blue camp left behind. Chester the chook has at least made it over. It seems there’s no merge feast so I feel sorry for poor Kristie, who didn’t get anything at the auction.
Everyone gets to work expanding the shelter but really they are dying to cement alliances.
Conner is worried he’ll be targeted and rightly so – Flick wants him gone after his perceived earlier betrayal (because she’s the only one allowed to play the game) and Brooke and El are on board.
Sue lays it out to the camera: “They’re all ra ra ra over there like a university sorority house. Full of their own arrogance.”
Sue warns Kristie and Kate that Conner is in trouble. Conner takes Kylie off for a super casual walk to show her the well and she seems to be on board. I hope she is, as she has’t shown herself to be good at strategy or the social game. Conner is keen to turn Sam back to his alliance, but I don’t know that Sam would break up with his new BFF Lee. Interestingly they aren’t talking about approaching Jenna Louise, a former yellow. Is that because she’s in the pretty girl alliance and we don’t know it?
Really, the old blues should target the unsuspecting Kylie and get that idol out of the game.

Lee reads his advantage in secret – he gets to stop someone from voting at a future tribal council, up until final five – and says he’ll tell his alliance.
Nick, meanwhile, talks about burning his but he just can’t help himself – he unwraps it. It’s an immunity idol clue and it sounds like it’s up a tree. He monkeys all over the place and is immediately spotted by Lee. At least when he knows he’s busted he shows Lee the clue and ropes him in to the search. Lee is suss but plays along. Nick finds it and tells Lee he will also only tell his alliance of six.
Sam finds some pink fabric washed up on the shore and the pretty girl alliance rip it up for friendship bracelets. The core alliance all get one – and Kristie. Way to stir the pot.


I wish we’d seen whose idea that was. Brooke’s?
And, still, no-one seems to be talking to JL. What does this mean?

Immunity challenge time
We don’t even get a welcome from JLap. Sam tells JLap the new tribe name is Fiafia, which is “happy” in Samoan.
The challenge is a Survivor classic: hanging upside down with your arms and legs wrapped around a poll. Girls often do well at this – and those who meditate – I’m guessing El and Kylie. If Kristie had had any food I’d guess her. In Survivor: Panama in 2006, it was won by Terry Deitz at around the 45-minute mark. In 2011, Andrea won the challenge on Redemption Island. The US usually holds this challenge above water for more drama, but this time we just have it above the sand – a cheaper option, no doubt.
Magic Matt is first out, then Sam. They know they’re not in danger. Conner, who knows how much he needs it, goes next. Next are Sue and FLick. Kate and Kristie are doing some awesome full body dangles. El and JL do a deal to drop out together and Lee is next, leaving Nick the last bloke. Kylie is encouraging Nick to hang on to the 60-minute mark and he just makes it.
Kate looks amazingly relaxed and in control and at 75 minutes JLap tells them they can only use one hand.
Poor Kristie is stunned: “I thought you were going to give me food.” (True – this often happens). Poor Kristie is destined to go hungry. She is the next one out – a great effort with no sustenance. Then Kate, who has been so strong, drops. It’s Kylie V upside down Brooke and Kylie makes the mistake of swapping arms, which is not allowed. Brooke wins the necklace.

Back at camp Nick wants Conner out, too, but he wants a vote split in case Conner has an island. He wants five for Conner, four Kate and they know Kylie may flip.
Matt, Sam and Lee go for a wander and Lee is wearing sneakers – so he must have had a second pair that survived the fire – and they chat about Nick’s general untrustworthiness, although, secretly, Matt doesn’t mind him. Lee asks Matt to explain why they need to do a split. Aaargh – come on, Lee! Get with the program. Sam and Lee aren’t happy that this seems to be all Nick’s plan.
Sam is not happy that his old tribemate, Conner, is the target, nor that Kate is the second option. He tells the camera: “He’s a good kid – baby bruvva.”
Sue sends Kate to talk to Kristie while Conner will work on Sam but the old blues have taken a leaf out of the Boston Rob playbook and don’t want to leave Sam alone. Brooke follows them as they try to chat. Kristie is also torn between proving loyalty to former and more recent tribemates because she could be the next target.
They head off to tribal and it seems either Conner or Kate will go home.


Tribal council
JLap chats to the final 13 and no-one says anything much, other than Lee echoing back to JLap that he’s playing based on mateship. Flick pretends she doesn’t know who’s in charge but then JLap brings up the pink wristbands. “Is that the alliance,” asks JLap. Brooke replies: “Definitely not.” JLap notes they must be friendship bands: “Friendship, in Survivor, means alliance.”
JLap tries to get Kate to plead for her life. “I’m not going to get down on my knees and beg,” says Kate. “I’m just going to be my own self.” (Soooo, Kate’s going home, then.)

Time to vote
We see Sue vote for Matt and Flick for Conner. “I’ll count the votes,” says JLap (I read an interview with him today in which he said some fans are upset he does not say “I’ll tally the votes”, Probst style.)
It’s Matt, Nick, Conner, Kylie, Kate, Conner, Kate, Conner, Kate, Conner, Kate, Conner and … it’s Conner.
He gives a gracious speech about everyone being great competitors while inside his heart is breaking. Ah, Conner – you were a likeable lad who made some mistakes along the way that came back to bite you but I wanted you to make it a little further.

Next time: Pretty girl alliance is talking about how awesome they are. Please, please let them come a cropper.
Who voted for whom: JL, Magic Matt, Kylie, Brooke – voted for Kate; Sam (how could you!), Kristie, Flick, Nick, El and Lee voted for Conner; Conner vote for Nick; Kate for Kylie and Sue for Matt. So the underdog alliance couldn’t even agree to vote for the same person!



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Australian Survivor – Sun, Sept 18


The way Channel 10 are promoting it the poor ole yellow tribe will be back at tribal council tomorrow night (Sunday). I would say the whole “Phoebe makes a move” thing is a misdirect, but up until now there promos have not tried to trick us at all.
In other Survivor news, I’ve heard a disturbing rumour that Channel 9 is going to air the upcoming season of US Survivor (Millennials V Gen X) – yeah, it IS a silly name) not on GO, as per usual. It will reportedly air on the flagship Nine channel but A WHOLE WEEK AFTER it screens in the US and at about 10.30pm at night. Yesterday I tweeted and posted a query about this on Facebook but Channel 9 has not responded.
I am hoping it’s all a terrible mistake.

It’s day 26 and everyone is looking gaunt, scruffy and exhausted.
At blue everyone is knackered because Firey Kylie did not want to make room in the shelter or something-or-other. It apparently escalated and it looks like no-one got any sleep. She tries to apologise the next morning but it turns into one of those “I’m sorry but it’s actually everyone else’s fault” moments. Oh, Kylie. You’ve upset Magic Matt, which is not good. Strangely we don’t get a to-camera piece from Nick about this. He’s not the narrator this episode.
At yellow Conner is worried about being out of the loop on the Andrew blindside, and whether Kate is still loyal to the core yellow alliance as she flipped to join Phoebe and Kristie (as well as Craig) in the voteout.
They go for a swim and Kate has a little breakdown. With anyone else you’d be worried she was bunging it on but Coma Kate just has that innate honesty about her.


Conner awkwardly pats her arm. They discuss targeting Phoebe next and the everyone – well, everyone who is not Phoebe and Kristie – at least seems cool with it.
Poor Craig is still looking for the hidden immunity idol, which is actually in Phoebe’s bag. Phoebs knows she is still in trouble, so tries buddying up to Conner. Conner, supposedly a huge Survivor fan, outright tells her that he has sworn loyalty to the others but, if she lasts, they could work together in the future. CONNER! You just smile and say yes, then rush back and tell your alliance so they know who aren’t doing deals. And when she asks to be told if she’s being voted out, just say yes. You can lie!

At blue Lee and Spidey Sam continue their bromance, bonding over their ineptitude with a fishing spear. The girls are sunbaking, admiring the view of Lee fishing.
(And here’s a shot for you, Windong


Magic Matt tells Brooke in not so many words she’s a flibbertyjibbet whose head is easily turned. Brooke is not happy and reckons he’s just jealous now he’s not the “man” of the tribe. It could be, or it could be the fact you guys are lying on the beach while there is no firewood and there are jobs to do around camp. Plus Matt is so pasty he could burst into flames if the sunlight touches his skin, so he can’t just loll on the beach.
Brooke starts thinking she needs a new alliance with non-ghost white people, and likes the look of Lee and Army Corporal El.
Things we still need an update on: Kate’s armpit puss and what wild animal has killed those released chickens.

Challenge time
Come on through, says JLap, mixing it up from Jeff’s come on in, guys. Blue team is surprised to see Andrew was voted out.
Kate says yellow, which has been on such as losing streak, is bringing the fire – a whole bonfire. She needs to be on a Brawn tribe with Lee, Kylie and Spidey Sam – she’d fit right in.
The challenge is a variation on the use a catapult to toss a bag challenge, but it’s more of a heptathlon using coloured coconuts. There’s a bit of volleyball action in there, dodgeball and balance beam work. The end section is a giant Connect Four type board – but with five.
Yet again blues are guns at the challenge while scrappy lil Conner tries hardest up against them but falls in the mud a coupla times. But then he doesn’t listen to Sue calling where to place the coconut, so that will cause angst. Yellow should have had Craig throwing rather than defending so they could get more coconuts over the “net”.

Back at yellow camp Conner is devo, blaming himself for the loss. The core alliance decides Phoebe should go home. They don’t even discuss a split. And then Conner goes and tells Phoebe it’s her. Nooooo! He tells the others what he’s done and they all agree it’s unlikely Phoebe has an idol. Why are they so sure? Then they tell Kristie they are all voting for Phoebe and she herself is safe. Kristie tears up a bit – awesome acting job, Kristie! And then she pretends to go and console Phoebe on the beach when actually they are both grinning like maniacs. So, who will the target? Craig’s the obvious threat but they need him for challenges.
They even have a chat about how to spell Phoebe’s name – a conversation which must happen a lot but we don’t really see it. I know they still won’t get it right, though.
Will Phoebe triumph is is this all just a misdirect by the editors and they are splitting the vote after all?
Australian Survivor isn’t sticking to the US rulebook but, let’s say the core – thinking that Phoebe didn’t have an idol – put two votes on Phoebe and two on Kristie, and the girls put two on Sue in turn. If the tie is deadlocked, those voted for can no longer vote. This would leave Craig, Conner and Kate in charge of the vote and they could vote out who they want. If they used the same 2-2-2 strategy and Phoebe played the idol, they could use their greater numbers to vote out Kristie on the revote. Just thinking on the fly here as I watch and type, so I may be wrong. I hope we at least get to see a fire-starter tiebreaker at some stage this season, because they are such fun.


At tribal council
They chat with JLap about how losing sucks and how they all are fairly sure who’s going home, which sucks because they are all friends yadda yadda … No one mentions how Kristie is rocking a side braid and looks like one of the lost children from Mad Max 3 in her brown shapeless outfit.
Craig writes “Pheobe” and so now I kinda hope it’s him the girls target because he cannot spell. We don’t see who the girls vote for – maybe it’s Conner, because he’s had a lot of airtime.
JLap is about to read the votes but Phoebe does the “umm, Jonathon …” and hands over the idol. Craig is a shattered man and Phoebe is grinning with delight – as she should be.
Only one of the four of them spells Phoebe correctly – they all deserve to go. And it’s Craig going home!
Well played, Phoebe and Kristie. Sad to see Craig go, though – he’s been great TV. He gives everyone a hug – even those who voted them out. He tell yellow one of them has to win the whole shebang. Bye, Craig!


Next time: Sue wants Phoebe gone but then we see footage of Phoebe (or Pheb’s, as Sue writes her name – urgh – kill me now over that apostrophe) telling Sue that Kristie knew all along she had an idol. Not cool, Pheb’s. We don’t see footage of yellow losing yet another challenge.

And Craig is calm and philosophical in his final to camera piece: “Bitch stole my idol, but, hey …”



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Australian Survivor recap episode 2 – Mon, Aug 22

Post the first tribal council the reds chat about how Des knew he had it coming. In the pitch black pigtails Kristie starts complaining her bag and shirt are missing and she reckons someone’s moved them because she’s an outsider. Uh oh – if you’re paranoid don’t let it show, Kristie. Although I wouldn’t put it past Des to do a Russell and bury belongings in the sand.
Over at blue everyone’s chilled because they have fire, water and shelter and it’s not raining – plus they won the first two challenges. Secret Squirrel Bianca is waiting for the cracks to appear and has noticed the two younger girls are tight and get on with Spidey Sam. She forges an alliance with firefighter Kylie and hopes to draw in old burny hand Conner.


Finally Kristie’s bag turns up and I wish we’d seen from the edit whether it had in fact been there the whole time. Kristie starts to lose it in a lonely spot in the jungle and good on army lady El for trying to calm her down. Is she losing the plot or did her drama teacher “friend” take it to make his position more secure/
Over at yellow Barry with the dreads finally makes the edit, joking about popping out for a croissant. Poor yellow still don’t have fire, so haven’t drunk water. Nick is licking palm fronds for moisture. He sets to with the flint and finally they get some coconut husk on fire, but they don’t even have a supply of tinder nearby to keep it going. The flame splutters out and Nick is devo.


Drama dude Evan *who is telling people he’s an art teacher) is trying to buddy up to ex-cricketer Lee because he thinks he can outwit him, but Lee of the clingy trunks and over-developed torso has twigged to Evan being a wildcard and is keeping him close to keep tabs on him.

Yellow try again to make fire and, finally, it works. Everyone seems to be chowing down at all the tribes – are they not rationing or were the producers generous for the first season?
Finally, 62-year-old Peter the air traffic controller and ex-military guy gets some air time. He did really well with the physical aspect of the challenge in last night’s episode but is now struggling – and tells Bianca so. He reckons he should leave. Nooo, Peter – we don’t even know you! Meanwhile, Flick and fellow young girl decide fit firey Kylie is totes annoying and should go.

Challenge time
JLap and his sinewy arms are back and he gets red to confess they still don’t have fire, when even the dorks at yellow managed it. The challenge involves, um, carrying, smashing, wriggling, knocking stuff over, yadda yadda. It’s an immunity AND a reward challenge, with the winner getting fishing gear. Runner-up gets a fishing line and hooks. Sue and Peter, the two oldest people yet, sit out the challenge. Can we get an update on Conner’s hand? As a qualified doctor, can JLap check if it’s a serious burn?
Super blues are smashing it in the challenge, yet again, and that poor brunette is going to have so many bruises. And again loser yellow manage to overtake the reds, who are again quibbling about how to do things.


Poor reds then have to do the course again with beefcake Lee as the person being carried. Why didn’t they choose someone lighter? Counting on him to smash all the blocks at the end – I guess he was a bowler when he played Big Bash.
Yellow wins thanks to the throwing of Kate, the women who survived a serious car accident years ago. For blue, weedy student Conner is throwing furiously but he can’t outgun Lee’s mighty guns.


Blue is heading to tribal council. Will Peter put his hand up to go home? Conner is worried he’s on the chopping block due to his challenge performance. Spidey Sam and Firey Kylie pow wow and decide Peter needs to go home because he’s not eating or drinking, even though he’s well liked.
But Bianca is worried that will put her on the wrong side of the numbers, so she tells Conner Flick should go. And he promptly tells Flick. Who then wants to get rid of Bianca.
As magician Matt notes, everyone is going nuts with the scrambling.

Tribal council


Come on – they can’t send Pete home before we discover why he’s wearing crimson pants. JLap is in his tribal uniform of checked shirt and chinos. He tries to find a crack in tribe unity but Flick and Kylie don’t bite. So he probes Pete about his illness, which is explained as not wanting to eat. Conner and Brunette Brooke say they could be in danger for their challenge performance, but they’re not. Hopefully Conner sticks around – he’s a sweetie.
Flick and Brooke tell JLap they’d never considered them being close could be perceived as a threat … der, girls! Have you not watched the show? You need a Malcolm and Denise secret alliance not a sorority sisters alliance.
JLap reads the votes and there’s one for Kylie, two for Pete and the rest Bianca.
Farewell, Secret Squirrel – you would have fared better on another tribe.

Next time
Well, we know Pete is still around because we see footage of him. It looks like there is one of those advantage twists where only a few tribe members are given secret info and have to decide whether or not to reveal it (as seen in the Blue Collar, White Collar etc season). These rarely end well.

Fun fact
I googled who on Survivor has started a fire using glasses, and came across this from an interview with fan fave Yau Man: “You don’t just hold your glasses over dry fiber – it would never work since your glasses are concave lenses and cannot focus the sun. the trick is to put a drop of water on the glass – it acts as a very powerful magnifying glass”
There you go – some sciencey learning.



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