Try Anna’s Mess

If anyone’s reading this in Sydney, pop along to the Shangri-La if you want to taste Anna’s white Death Star from the MasterChef elimination challenge.

From their website: Available for sale from our pop-up on the ground floor, Lobby Lounge from 8 a.m. on Tuesday, 7 June until 11 July 2016.
Anna’s Mess in a Jar, $8.50, takeaway
Small Anna’s Mess, $11.50, take-home box
Large Anna’s Mess, $39.50, (serves four) take-home box
A Sweet addition to your delightful High Tea experience, $4 per person
Opening Hours:
7:00am – 11:00pm, Monday to Friday
8:00am – 12:00am, Saturday
8:00am – 10:00pm, Sunday



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MasterChef – Mon, June 6 – elimination

Punk pastry chef Anna Polyviou is back (yay – first female chef this season). The bottom three contestants from the mystery box challenge have just three hours to recreate and 15 minutes to plate up her Mess.
Now that looks a far cry from the Mess I’m used to, which is what you make when your pav cracks.


Last year Anna set the bottom three the challenge of making this carrot cake:
annacarrotcake
It was Fiona V Rose V Jacqui. As usual, Rose did quite well at following a recipe when the pressure was on (helped by landing in elimination so many bloody times) and was praised by Anna, while Scottish Fiona was sent packing.
****
So it’s Tiny Top Knot Harry, Floppy Fringe Charlie and Pony Tail Nicolette in the firing line but, wisely, Nicolette uses her immunity pin and Elise has to take her place. Elise has never been in the bottom three before but she loves cooking desserts; while we know Charlie tends to rush recipes and make mistakes and Harry’s strength is savoury.
Anna arrives and reveals her “pink Death Star”, as Harry calls it.


It looks fabulous but to make good on the “Mess” name, she picks it up and smashes it on the bench. How do they serve this in the restaurant? On a massive platter? Otherwise the floor would be covered in coulis. Actually, it’s probably more of an exhibition dish.

And they’re cooking … Elise seems calm but warning bells start ringing the moment we hear Harry say meringue kisses are easy. They’re not as pretty as Elise and Charlie’s.
We’re getting Charlie back story: He wants to open a cafe on the Mornington Cafe with his sister. Do I sense a Charlie redemption here? Has he finally calmed down and found his groove?
Uh oh – Harry’s stuffed up already! He’s realised he’s forgotten to put sugar in his sponge and has to start again.


Elise is doing well, but we get a talking head from Zoe saying Charlie looks to have forgotten to put gelatine in his berry mousse. Nooo!
It’s time to temper the white chocolate and Anna mentioned at the start how tricky this can be. None of the contestants has tempered white chocolate before but at least Anna said the temperatures they need are in the recipe.
It looks like Zoe is the anointed one of talking heads today, as she again points out Charlie is not stirring his white chocolate. So, that back story was because Charlie’s going home.


Ooh, Elise is a pharmacy technician. I guess those skills come in handy when making desserts as attention to detail is crucial. But she’s starting to feel the pressure now and she accidentally boils her mousse. She’s serving it anyway – a tactic that served airline captain Brett well when he cookied up his quail pate in the last elimination.
The red silicone moulds of death are wreaking havoc. Elise can’t pop out her domes (that sounds risque) and someone on the gantry hekofully yells out: “Don’t stress!” A brulee torch does the trick, but the moulds of death strike again for Charlie, due to his forgotten gelatine.
Charlie manages to get his white chocolate dome out nicely but Harry and Elise are having dramas and as Elise pushes on hers cracks appear. Harry starts slamming his mould on the bench and I have to look away. Even Mr Juz, who doesn’t watch cooking shows, glances up from his iPad and says: “I’m stressed out just watching this.”
Come on, Anna – tell them what to do – Australia is on tenterhooks.
Was I wrong – did we get Charlie back story because he is the only one who gets a successful dome? Anna yells at Harry not to blow torch it or it will melt.
Guys, at least get your other elements on the plate so you can serve something. Harry finally gets half a dome out. And then so does Elise! Thank god for that. The white chocolate bra cups are a bit banged up but at least they have something to serve.

Time to taste
Harry is first to plate up his Mess and it looks not too bad. Not as speccy as Anna’s, but pretty darn good. Anna tells him the chocolate looks good. Gaz asks the leading eotional questions and we see Harry’s cocky facade drop as he says he has no job or home to go back to. That and the fact he’s been locked up in the MC house with no access to Tinder. To cheer him up they let him smash his Mess. Geez, I wish Matt had worn his vanilla thickshake suit today. Gaz loves the curd and George says the choc is great. Anna doesn’t like the meringues but he’s done a great job overall.
Elise plates up and her mousse is running and there is a crack in her dome, which she tries to cover up with a choc disc, knowing the judges will still spot it. No tears from Elise. Hers is super splatty, because of the runny mousse. The judges aren’t fuss about the crack and they like the curd. Anna says she’s done well but the mousse is runny.
Charlie plates up but knows his chocolate dome in thick – he’s worried it won’t smash. At least he seems calmer about his lot in life. Chuck it, Chuck! He does and … ad break. We get serious looks from the judges and it did smash, so, total beat up by the editing suite. The judges like the flavours but note the chocolate is really thick and the curd is very soft (because he forgot the gelatine).

The judges’ verdict
Harry’s version was the best so we know it has to be Charlie. Poor Charlie – you seem lovely but the peculiar pressure of the MC kitchen was not for you. Anna gives him an uplifting chat and offers him work experience in her kitchen. So, when is Channel 10 giving Anna her own Chopped-style show? She has that theatrical vibe.

Epilogue
Charlie has completed work experience at Burch and Purchese. He is currently working at East – Bar and Dining in Mount Martha. (Working at? Does that mean he’s a waiter? Only three desserts on the menu but it’s close to home for him east)

Bye, Charlie!
Bye, Charlie!


Tomorrow night

It’s a reinvent-the-eclair immunity challenge with Chloe, Brett and my new fave, Trent. Yum! Surely Chloe is the frontrunner, though, with her dessert track record. Will she do some kind of smoked caramel, parfait-filled eclair?



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MKR semi 2 – Anna and Jordan V Lauren and Carmine

It’s semi final 2 and, really, isn’t everyone tuning in just to see one team go down in flames? Still, stranger things have happened. Anna and Jordan aren’t used to the pressure of Kitchen HQ.
Let’s play Lauren bingo. Comment “bingo” once you hear her say any of these phrases:
Amazeballs
Two fiddy Kay
Totes
We’re not going down without a fight
We got this
Anything in an accent
Bonus points if Carmine says “youse”

Eastern states have the advantage with this one, but play along anyway. Losers can just drink the Haterade.

It’s only a minute in and already she’s said “two fiddy kay”. BINGO! Bit sad Manu is not in purple velvet – perhaps they’re saving it for the grand final.
We start with speeches about how Carmine (gosh, he looks tired) and Lauren (who always looks fresh) are the fighters and Anna and Jordan are the frontrunners but can they handle the heat blah blah.
The menus
Lauren and Carmine
Entree: Seared scallops with pea cream and speck
Main: Sous vide chicken with smoked potato puree and brussels sprouts
Dessert: Grilled peach with yoghurt mousse and peach sorbet

Anna and Jordan
Entree: Lightly poached oysters with fennel and apple
Main: Chilli angel hair pasta with crab and pippies
Dessert: Cannoli with orange and mascarpone ice cream
Both menus sounds tasty. Anna and Jordan’s have more that could go wrong and the dishes need more technical skill than Lauren and Carmine’s menu. There’s a lot of work in making cannoli shells.

Finally - back in a nice shirt after a few shockers.
Finally – back in a nice shirt after a few shockers.

Everyone’s multi-tasking like mad and Lauren is “all good in the hood”. BINGO! Jordan’s oyster cream looks unusual – is this going to work? Anna is frying her cannoli shells now but Jordan is worried she hasn’t started her pasta dough for main yet. Surely they had a plan beforehand of what to do when? Is Anna just ignoring it?
To their credit Lauren and Carmine have planned every move they make – Carmine can’t take a breath without her permission. And it’s got them through a lot of sudden death cook offs.

In the ad break we learn House Rules starts Wednesday 7.30pm, so they’re getting the jump on MasterChef.

How  gorgeous do Tasia and Gracia look on the sidelines.
How gorgeous do Tasia and Gracia look on the sidelines.

Anna finally listens to Jordan and makes her past dough and is hilarious, referring to the dough as “she”.
Time to plate up and both dishes look good – Carmine and Lauren have obviously been studying plating techniques as the scallops look so much prettier than their usual dishes.
Time to chew


The oysters actually looked much more appetising than in this official MKR pic.


Liz likes the vibrancy of the scallops and says it’s a classic dish. Colin sums it up: “It’s good cooking, it’s got flavour, but I think it’s safe.” Guy likes the flavour of the pea cream – must have been that packet stock Lauren used.
The judges think Jordan’s oyster creation is an “interesting”-looking dish – interesting because they are not sure what else to say. Pete tastes the juice and puckers his lips and shakes his head. Uh oh. Colin is eating with his eyes shut.

Is Fass  blinded by the whiteness of his own jacket?
Is Fass blinded by the whiteness of his own jacket?

Liz gets a bit of oyster shell – disaster. Karen and Fass like the creativity of the dish but it hasn’t quite worked. Liz finds the oyster cream “slightly unpleasant” but the shell was the final straw. Manu likes most of the elements but the oyster cream is too “full on”.
So this round goes to Carmine and Lauren.

Main course round
L & C are only just starting their sorbet – hope it sets in time.
Over at the other kitchen Jordan is naming all the blue swimmer crabs he’s dismembering. The Sisters, on the sidelines, are worried. They’re doing angel hair pasta which, as Jordan says, is tricky as the finer the pasta, the more chance of it clumping.
Carmine is showing off a new skill he’s learnt: smoking potatoes. They bicker a little over whether they are smoked enough. Guess the judges will tell us who’s right.
They’s sous vided the chicken, which is smart as they know it will be perfect. Chicken is a little boring, though, considering the other team is confiting crab legs. I don’t order it when I go out for a fancy meal as it’s such an everyday protein at home. But then, as Lauren says: “This ain’t no Plain Jane chicken.” BINGO!
Jordan is starting to get flustered and it’s hard to watch.
Lauren is letting her jus boil furiously as she asks Carmine: “Where you at?” He deadpans: “I’m on the right hand side of the kitchen at the moment.” Good one, Carmine. So the dreadful accent comes out: “You know what I mean, boy!” BINGO.
Both teams are rushing. Carmine’s forgotten the brussels sprouts but the other team is much more disorganised. Jordan’s pasta is clumping a bit and the Sisters say the plating looks inconsistent. Even Manu – who is dead keen on trying their seafood sauce – is worried for them.
Plating done, Jordan and Anna look deflated, saying it looks worse than what they make at home.

Time to chew


The judges prepare to taste the chook and admire the pour of the soz. Karen notes it’s another classic, simple but well done. Guy thinks it’s not simple at all and he likes the soz. Fass thinks there is too much potato on the plate and Manu rates the jus as the best of the comp. The brussels sprouts were inconsistently cooked.
Karen loves the flavour of the pasta dish but notes she didn’t get a cherry tomato, whereas another plate had five. Fass would be happy to eat it while out for a meal but is not sure if it’s semi final worthy. Manu says the dish reflects the rushed finish.

Dessert time
Carmine fills his ramekins with peach sorbet and in his flustered state accidentally drops the churner container in the bin. Luckily they’d plated already.

Anyone for peach sorbet with cabbage leaf?
Anyone for peach sorbet with cabbage leaf?

On the sidelines, the Sisters are salivating over the look of Anna and Jordan’s cannoli, but note the praline is too warm for blitzing, so it’s not crunchy. Anna goes ahead even though it’s so warm she can stretch it in her hands but luckily Jordan tastes it and refuses to put it on the plate. They decide to try a ganache instead.
On the other side L & C are rushing and trying to put cold yoghurt mousse on to a hot crumb. Just put it on the other side, Lauren!
Lauren’s dessert is certainly more modern but the yoghurt and sorbet look runny and the cannoli is just begging to be chomped into.

Time to chew


Fass says peaches “sing of summer” and the yoghurt cuts through the sweetness of the mousse. Karen thinks they use simple ingredients well.
Guy says cannoli takes him back to his childhood and it’s “refined”. Karen says the pastry is textbook perfect. Manu loves the ice cream and he likes this dish more than the entree and main.

Scoring
C&L
Karen is full of praise for their “celebration of the produce”. Ditto Guy. Fass says their chook was “a lesson how to cook chicken”. Pete knocks the sprouts but Manu loves the jus.
Guy 8, Liz 8, Karen 7 (seems low given her raving), Fass 7, Pete 8, Manu 8. Total 46/60

Looks like Anna and Jordan can only win if they get props for technical difficulty – and if the magnificent cannoli wipes out the memory of entree.
A&J
Fass tells them a better way to balance their oysters (he’s always good with constructive criticism) but Liz relives the horror of biting on oyster shell.

Shell shocked.
Shell shocked.

The judges rave about the flavour of the pasta but note the presentation was haphazard. More positive cannoli comments. Manu really “anchoyed it”.
Guy 7, Fass 6 (when Jordan see this he knows they are going home)
Defeat is in their eyes.
Defeat is in their eyes.
Karen 6, Liz 5, Manu 6, Pete 6. Total 36/60

Jordan is devastated but Anna is cool as a cucumber. A concerned Manu asks: “Are you all right, buddy?” So all that practise at the bottom paid off for C&L when the pressure was on, plus they chose smart dishes they could complete within the timeframe.

Who'd have thunk it.
Who’d have thunk it.

Pete gives a nice speech about the great food Anna and Jordan have produced and how they’ve inspired families to cook with their kids. Jordan may be crying now but he’ll fall on his feet. Surely a media career beckons – he just needs to find the right gig.
I wish the judges would give separate score for technical difficulty and creativity as well, so teams who push themselves can get a scoring boost.

See you for the grand final, 7.30pm tomorrow.

Final four. Go, Sisters!
Final four. Go, Sisters!

Who’ll be watching House Rules on Wed? And MasterChef on Sunday?



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MKR – Tues – Anna and Jordan cook

Anna and Jordan arrive home to a party that was not at all organised by the producers. They totally did not just leave their house, drive round the block and pull up out the front. Why does no-one else get a party? Other teams get a quick cuddle if they are lucky. Thank goodness Jordan is back in a nice shirt again.
It’s off to the shops and they are getting their fruit and veg at a greengrocer, not Coles. And their meat is from a specialty butcher but the blue swimmer crab comes from Coles (perhaps that was in the contract).

Menu
Entree
Gnocchi with mushrooms and truffle
Squid with almond tarator and citrus salsa (tarator is a type of soz)
Main
Black and white crab ravioli with a crab bisque
Suckling pig with apple and celeriac
Dessert
Rhubarb and ginger bombe Alaska
Vanilla panna cotta with espresso jelly and crostoli

It all sounds divine.
I can’t remember any team cooking a whole animal before so this will be cool to watch. Jordan says: “We’re lucky enough to have an outdoor kitchen with a commercial size oven.”
Anna and Jordan are multitasking like crazy in their two kitchens – they have so much to do. I can totally see Anna giving cooking demos or classes in the future. There’s a little light bickering, mainly because Anna won’t trust Jordan to do his job, which is the gnocchi. Surprised she didn’t do that one while he made dessert, which needs less intuition.
Here come the guests and Lauren is in a really nice dress, but then they show a confessional of her again mentioning the “two-fiddy-kay”. Urgh.
lauren dress

They love to put Zana in plunging necklines.
They love to put Zana in plunging necklines.
The guests are seated next door to the outdoor kitchen so are getting tantalising wafts of that piggy sizzling away. And here come Pete and Manu, to the strains of Dare by Gorillaz.

As the menus are read there are lots of happy smiles from the guests and I’m with the sisters – suckling pig all the way. Laura and Zana both think it’s a menu well within Anna’s capabilities. Poor Laura knows she’s on the chopping block and safe Lauren looks like the cat who’s got the cream.
Back in the kitchen Jordan is worried that Mama hasn’t assembled the bombe Alaskas yet – he seems to be in charge of time management. She listens but then, just as they are debating the best way to cook the squid, in comes Manu. I’ve never seen him come in so early before – are they trying to rattle them? Then, Jordan has gnocchi drama because they are so delicate and losing “pillowiness”, so Anna takes over. They do look delicious, though. There’s a bit of tension over cooking methods so Jordan takes over plating up while Anna cooks the protein, which is playing to each of their strengths. Plating done, they kiss and make up. “Come here – I want to apologise because I’m being a bitch,” Jordan says.

Time to chew


Manu tells them they need to work as a team and Jordan confesses “I’ve been a bit of a pain”.
“I would agree with that,” Manu deadpans. “I would never talk to my mum like this.” Anna says it’s all in the heat of the moment and “no offence taken.”
Manu had the gnocchi and loved the mushroom flavours and texture, but says the gnocchi – while delicious and caramelised – wasn’t right.
Pete loved the squid dish’s flavours but thought the tarator was too pasty. But it was still excellent.

Back in the kitchen
Jordan’s a bit down and has a little moment. “I just want it really bad,” he tells Anna, crying. Awww.

Poor boy.
Poor boy.
In the restaurant Lauren says the squid is a “flavour bomb” while Mitch and Laura critique the gnocchi harshly. No hairs, though.
Anna gets on to the crab while Jordan laminates the pasta, creating cool black lines with the squid ink-dyed pasta. Impressive – I thought they’d just do separate black ravioli and white ravioli.
Stripey!
Stripey!
They seem to have an electric pasta machine – I’ve never seen one before! Google says you can get one for about $250.
Anna and Jordan are bickering a bit about the pig, and how to achieve crackling without drying out the meat. And their pig juss is too salty for sauce, so Jordan has the great idea to add his celeriac and apple liquid, and it works. They plate up and the black stripes on the ravioli look like nori. Surprised they didn’t serve something green with the pork.

Time to chew


As the mains are served Laura whispers to Mitch: “Smells like two-minute noodles”. Ooh – snarky.
Pete had the pork: “You took a huge risk cooking a suckling pig.” It’s another fake out. “I absolutely adored it… I won’t say it was a pretty dish but it was a bloody good dish.”
Manu liked the technique of the striped pasta and though the dish was really tasty, but the bisque was too thick.
Zana finds the bisque too rich but they are mainly interested in showing negative comments from the Curlies.

Back in the kitchen it’s dessert time and Anna gets on to the crostoli. I remember the twins made this last year. Then Anna has a blast wielding the brulee torch for the meringue. Will they cop flack for serving panna cotta in a glass? They would on MasterChef, where it’s all about wobbly bits. It looks good, though.

Time to chew


Pete pours the spirit over the bombe Alaska and Manu flicks the gas lighter on, but there’s only a small flame and everyone’s underwhelmed. He struggles to cut through the base of the dessert. And it turns out it’s because they froze their sponge with the rhubarb and ice cream, so it’s all rock hard. This must be a recipe they’ve never done before. “You’ve got this layer of icy fruit which isn’t pleasant at all, guys.” The meringue was good. Pete says it’s below average. Uh oh – a bombe.
Manu loved the flavour of his panna cotta and the espresso jelly. The crostoli was the perfect accompaniment. However, while Manu is ok with the dessert being in a glass the panna cotta is too thick. I can’t tell whether he said it should be “bouncing” or “dancing”. (Think they used too much gelatine.)
The Sisters are the only ones who’ve enjoyed everything tonight but they did luck out with their choice of textures. Even Lauren, who’s heaped praised upon the other dishes, hates the bombe Alaska. And, of course, Mitch and Laura are facing elimination and didn’t like anything.
So that’s two talented teams who’ve faltered under pressure – they could have done with a few of Lauren’s sudden death cook-offs to toughen them up.
Time to score, and Anna and Jordan should still beat Curlies score of 60.

Scores
Sisters 8; Carmine and Lauren 6; Zana and Plus One 8; Curlies 6. Total 28/40

Entree Pete 8 (squid), Manu 7 (gnocchi); Main Pete (pig) 9, Manu (ravioli) 9; Dessert Pete 4 (bombe Alaska), Manu 7 (panna cotta) . Total 72.

Tomorrow night it’s Zana and Gianni and don’t forget there’s another episode Thursday night, as there’s no MKR Sunday. Presumably we won’t hear Z and G’s scores until the Thursday so they can string out who’s made the semi finals. And what the heck is Manu holding up in the ad?

What eez eet?
What eez eet?



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