MKR Ep 4 Sunday recap

Chat about tonight’s episode here. I hope to have a recap up later. And here ’tis:
Here we go, it’s my home team and I have high hopes, judging from the ads, that we’ll see some tasty food.
I love trying to spot the SA landmarks when the contestants are from Adelaide. We get Colonel Light’s statue, views of the revamped Adelaide Oval, the tram at Glenelg (at the beach). The voiceover guy refers to the “cottage suburb of Plympton”. I have no idea what that means. It’s a decent enough suburb but not at all fancy.Rosie and Paige stop for a coffee at Froth & Fodder cafe, which is behind behind my local Kmart.
Rosie gets the happy family montage while Paige is a single gal with a dog who didn’t finished high school “they asked me to leave”. Rosie is mum to two girls and studies tourism part time, while Paige does some safety type job for a gas company (I think). But that doesn’t really matter because in MKR land they are “SA Best Mates”.
They dash into Coles and I’m pretty sure last time I was inside that particular supermarket there were several shoppers with whom I was scared to make eye contact. The shelves are looking far more fully stocked than usual.
Their menu sounds delicious.
Entree: Lamb backstrap with pickled beetroot ad creme fraiche
Main: Chicken, leek, zucchini pie with mushy minted peas
Dessert: Grandma’s gingerbread with rum and raisin ice cream
Back home and it’s a lovely old character place – wonder if it’s really Rosie’s?
Their theme is “Big Love Grub” and they’ve made a terrific crafty-looking sign to for it but – oops – part of it falls off when they hang it up. and now we know it must indeed be Rosie’s house, because she runs straight to the shed and finds her hammer and craft glue. However, they’re down to 2 hours 8 minutes and they have yet to pick up a knife.

Drop the hammer and turn on the stove, Rosie.
Drop the hammer and turn on the stove, Rosie.

Not a lot of time to sort out their ice cream and puff pastry.
The girls shred their pie veg in the food processor to save time.
The guests are here and Cougar is hoping for a Steven Bradbury – is cub old enough to know who that is? “I just want to smell the smell of burnt something.”
Everyone thinks the room looks awesome except, of course, Zana and Plus One turn up their noses at the word “grub”.
They butter their guests up by giving them slippers and a lot of thought has gone into them, even finding flamingo ones for Jordan.
mkrslippers1

mkrslipperspugs

mkrslipperszana
Guests pass the time doing a poetry slam, while Rosie perfects the pickled beetroot and it looks divine.
The judges arrive to the strains of Stevie Wonder’s “Superstition” to show they are funky, followed by The Doors “Roadhouse Blues”.
Cougar is a little embarrassed to have to see them so soon after her food fiasco: “I almost felt like we artistically insulted them. And I desperately don’t want them to think that we don’t take it seriously.” That’s the most genuine she’s been in a week of shows. But then she reads the menu and reverts to delusional form: “I don’t think it’s a menu that could beat ours. If we did the right thing and we were on form and got our plating right, I think our menu would have beaten this menu.”
Yeah, caesar salad with both burnt and undercooked bacon is way fancier than lamb backstrap with pickled beetroot.
Zana loves lamb but screws up her nose at the pickled beetroot.

Beetroot? Isn't that poor people food?
Beetroot? Isn’t that poor people food?

Dramatic music for the cutting of the lamb and, yes, it’s perfectly pink.
Rosie doesn’t know how to plate up but they do a great job of making a meat dish look pretty and light enough for an entree.
But, here we go with the faux derogatory comments: Cougar is “underwhelmed”.


Uh oh, and so is Pete. They didn’t season the dish or dress the leaves. Rookie mistakes! But both judges agree the lamb was cooked perfectly and Manu loved the beetroot. Still, it’s a far cry from last episode’s “one spoonful was enough for me”.
The teams think the dish was ok but they are feeling hungry.
Jordan is looking forward to mains, and he hopes the pie is as good as Mum’s, who apparently writes his name on top in pastry. Awwww.
Zana and Plus One “don’t not normally order pies; we’ve never made a pie”.
In the kitchen the girls have not even started the ice cream machine, which is a real worry.
Manu pops into the kitchen to suggest one of them cook something instead of both shelling peas – the pressure is getting to them.
It gets worse … there is not enough pastry to make individual whole pies for everyone. What were they thinking? I know teams throw a lot of recipes at the producers in advance and see what sticks, but it’s common sense you’d need to at least triple your usual recipe. So it’s a pot pie instead and at least they are doing a taste tester.
And they’re learning from Cougar’s mistake by washing their hairy carrots thoroughly. Tester pie’s pastry lid collapses but it’s because they haven’t pinched it.
The guests are getting hungry while they wait for pie dramas to be resolved and the girls know they will be marked down for it.
Cougar is hungry but delighted.
In the ad break there’s a promo for the new teams, so they must start Wednesday night, as Mama and Son cook next, then the Lawyers. And there’s one girl who doesn’t like chocolate. Yep, she’s the Zana of the group. I have a friend who doesn’t eat chocolate but it’s because it gives her migraines. So unless I see a medical certificate from this girl’s doctor, I’m barracking for her to fail already.
And the pressure continues to fluster the girls – they’ve overcooked the carrots. I’d have chucked them in a tonne of butter and maybe some honey to see if I could save them, but they decide not to include them on the plate.
They are worried the pies aren’t quite cooked but are scared to keep the guests waiting, so it’s on with a plop of peas and away we go.


The pastry layers on the judges’ pie look awesome, but Manu eez sad that the pie filling does not have much texture. And Pete says the flavours are out of whack, with salty peas and too much wine in the filling.
Zana and Plus One have never made a pie yet with typical modesty still know they would do it better.
Time for dessert. And they are yet to cook the gingerbread, which will take a while to bake.
Zana is big noting her ability to stay calm in the kitchen as she and Plus One have very stressful jobs with people’s lives at steak. Umm, hello – you’re sitting at a table with two police officers!
The gingerbread is ready and it’s a cake, as per Paige’s gran’s recipe. Surprise, surprise the ice cream isn’t set, so they anchor it on the plate with some chopped macadamias “for crunch”. If you want crunch, you don’t pick macadamias, and certainly not untoasted ones.


Manu says the booze is missing from the ice cream (which Rosie was worried about) and Pete feels the cake lacks spice.
Paige is gutted; she’s let grandma down.
The Curlies love the cake but no one likes the vanilla ice cream with raisins, sans rum.
The girls are crying on the floor of the kitchen, for fear they were “Cheryl and Matt bad”.

I should have listened to you about the raisins.
I should have listened to you about the raisins.

Surely they can do better than 30?
Team scores: Mama and Son 6; Cougar Town 4 (to be expected); Cops 4 (bit strategic there); Zana and That Guy 5; Curlies 7 (they must really want Cougars to fail)
Total: 26/50, so they know they’re safe.
Judges: Entree Pete 6, Manu 7; Main Pete 5, Manu 5; Dessert Pete 5, Manu 5.
Total:59
Tomorrow night it’s off to Perth and what looks to be some delicious Maltese food and a snappy shirt from Jordan. Yum.



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Windsong

I really hope the girls do well. They’re my favourite (aside from Jordan, but he’s only one half of a team, so…). And lord knows, after the rubbish the other contestants had to endure thanks to the Cougar and her Cub, they deserve a good feed tonight.

All happening

I wonder who the couple were that got psssst in this round and banned from drinking. There was a story in Courier Mail today. The person telling all was not named.

Windsong

Yeah, the story was that the producers and camera-people had to step in, because the contestants kept drinking (as they were cooking) and they got more and more sloshed as the night wore on.

brain dead dave

It’s a bit much to expect the guests to stick to colouring in and writing poetry during the agonizing two hour wait for mains. Cougar and Cub for mine.

Windsong

Zana ticks another couple of the, “OMG are you serious?!” boxes by monologuing about how lamb is her favourite “protein” but she likes her “proteins” cooked a certain way. THE WORD IS MEAT, YOU PRETENTIOUS TWERP. *sigh*

Meanwhile, Jordan talks to his mother about the entree, and says that he’s not gonna be able to get that meat out of his mind. Clearly, I think the editors are starting to have too much fun with him, heh.

Windsong

I feel like Jordan’s snappy shirts should be an internet meme by now. I don’t really get the flamingo thing, but I still love him.

Interestingly enough, Juz, my dad gets the same thing. He can’t eat very much chocolate because he gets quite a bad headache from it. I did giggle at Cheryl’s constant thoughts that maybe Rosie and Paige would fail so grandly as to score less than 31 … uh, Cheryl? You and your cub served up three courses of inedible dreck. Unless a team comes out and actually physically assaults the contestants, you guys are going to stay glued to the bottom of the leader-board.

Rosie

I chose not to bother watching MKR this year, but after reading your excellent recap – thanks, Juz! – I may take a look at this one in the morning. I mean, it has my namesake cooking in it!

Although the show does smell of the same old, same old, which is why I decided not to bother with it this year. Who knows, maybe Rosie and her mate will change my mind?

Bruiser Brody

Just FYI – have a mate who know’s/ familiar with Mother-son combo.
Word on the street is that Man-E-Faces Zana was actually quite bearable at all restaurants…
but the Real Biyatch is actually the Mum!!
(*I know, i’m as shocked as you that the editing process has manufactured a villain, who will stunningly/ coincidentally be the last ep before elimination. Hot forecast: they keep us on tenterhooks/ fake-out that they are somehow sufficiently retarded enough to poll less than 31 votes!)

I just need to see CougarCub’s next round menu tho…new, simple, odd dish sweeping the nation…Ham…In A Burger!!!

daisy

That pie mains looks like someone left something nasty on it. ????

HeWhoHasNoName

Cougar is still the most frightening thing I’ve ever seen on tv… Was running on the treadmill at the gym this morning and watching Sunrise on the TV and saw Cougar on screen for a moment in a bikini… Decided to run home instead and gouge my eyeballs out with a teaspoon.

HeWhoHasNoName

Ah my eyes… people at work will be freaked now seeing my eyes bleed!

All happening

Keep them coming HEWHOHASNONAME. Your comments have made my morning.

Bruiser Brody

i don’t know what he sees in her…
oh wait, there they are!

Windsong

There was an article in my Yahoo newsfeed this morning about this. It wasn’t the blue one-suit, either, but a two-piece bright red bikini.

Damn it, where’s the photoshoot with Jordan in swimwear, huh? Am I asking too much?

brain dead dave

Yes, Chezza is definitely rocking a bikini in No Idea or TV Weak as advertised last night. I’ll check it out at the supermarket later. It didn’t look great on tv. She ain’t Susan Sarandon.

daisy

Hmmm Susan Sarandon. Makes me wonder who I would choose for best looking over 60.

daisy

Maybe Catherine Deneuve, or in a strange way Charlotte Rampling.

daisy

Oh, I see what you mean re Susan Sarandon. Well she looked OK imo. Sometimes those puppies are just hard to contain….unless you get the Amish to run you up a nice floral and lace frock.

HeWhoHasNoName

It’s official I’m now impotent! After finally controlling my eye bleeds I decided to reload this page….big mistake.

Rosie

Okay, gice, I have now watched my first MKR episode of 2016. May or may not watch any more.

The look on Cougar’s face swiftly turning from smug, to sour disappointment was amusing, I grant you, so I can only assume their effort was pretty dire. Not dire enough to make me wanna watch it though.

I may watch the lawyers however, in the desperate hope that they fuck up good and proper. Sigh. I’m getting sucked in, aren’t I?

brain dead dave

From the promo it appears the lawyers’ stove is blowing out as much smoke as those two have blown up their …..but they should beat Cougar easily.They only need to “nail” one course to do it.

I’ll keep watching, it’s rubbish but it’s rating quite well. It’s almost a new genre~ a cooking /mystery/soap/horror hybrid.

Every night is like a tucker trial for Manu and Pete.

donae

why would you shell peas when sitting on the bench behind you is two large packets of Bird’s Eye frozen

Izobel2

And when the pies are in the oven you could, you know, check that your boiled carrots weren’t turning to mush!