MAFS week 2 – the non-Polynesian is back

The blurb for tonight’s MAFS: Last season’s favourite groom John Robertson returns for a second chance at love. And will Troy meet his Barbie dream girl at the altar?

Hmm, is “favourite groom” stretching it? Let’s hope he meets a lady with less specific cultural background requirements than his past bride. Or are the producers doubling down with someone as equally unsuitable.



Facebooktwitterredditmail
Subscribe
Notify of
guest
104 Comments
Oldest
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Maz

Troy’s dream girl.

brain dead dave

Nice legs.

Bolders

In other words, plastic and doesn’t talk.

Maz

🤣🤣🤣John is asked why he back. Umm, because the producers asked him back.

brain dead dave

He didn’t seem too thrilled with his bride in the promos for this year. He may have said he was, but ……. I see trouble ahead and I’m no psychic.

Maz

Ashley has just told Australia how to pick up an air attendant.

Just to show how compatible Ashley and Troy are, the producers have them both playing tennis and using the Barbie reference.

Troy is no Ken. #justsaying

Maz

Australia is exposed to Troy’s brushing technique.

Troy wants a girl who weights 57kgs.😲

Bolders

the same weight as his ego.

Daisy

Or Troy knows full well that he is being a chara ter and wants celebrity. Bad celebrity.

Maz

“Pure-bred from the mother”. OMG, what does Troy do for a living?

brain dead dave

Runs a puppy farm?

Maz

Troy is just sleezy.

Maz

Ashley’s sister Summer has called Troy out.

This relationship is a no. Troy is slime.

brain dead dave

Summer had that buck toothed bullshit artist worked out in a flash.

Daisy

My mum would have loved him; “Are you two sisters?” is her favourite…and my least favourite.

Maz

Troy is upset that the sisters didn’t treat him like he is “perfect”. 😪

Daisy

I like Troy’s style; puts his order in. Might as well tell Santa, “I want a bike, a football and a blonde bimbo”.

Bobi

Like, “I want a Polynesian”?
I’m still surprised that didn’t cause more of an uproar.

Daisy

Yeah, like if she had said, “I only want a white guy”. A white heterosexual. 🤐

Daisy

Back track: I was watching the first episode rerun à la THE VOICE. That is I was just listening while I did pottery. It made a difference with Mask lady. She sounded quite nice. Well nicer than she looks.
As for the other two; the lady with a daughter, she and her hubby are horrible. She even said it MIGHT NOT work if he didn’t accept her daughter.

Calorie Loader

I caught the might too Daisy. I’m thinking what does might entail? adoption and reconnection at 18 if she’ll have you??

Daisy

Visitation?

Calorie Loader

That’ll do it

Daisy

I reckon the girl who had the threesome and will allow her daughter visitation is seriously off. She looks like she should be a well behaved dag but talks and acts like a Dr Phil classic. Her husband is off too because he keeps getting ready to dump her until he discovers she can go a new sexual position. They would make a good threesome with Troy.

Daisy

Who is just waiting for joyful Joe to be on??? 😊

Maz

So according to the relationship experts, getting a step-kid is the cure to the Peter Pan Syndrome.

Daisy

I am ffding the experts and cutting to the meat of the programme. I think by now we all know the producers decide which characters are most watchable. The sexperts are merely a ruse for the coupling of complete strangers from different cities.

Maz

Nothing signifies success more than black rim glasses and a disposal coffee cup in your hand.

Daisy

Maz, you are nailing this better than an eager goom on the first night of the honeymoon.

Maz

Fake emotion.

Maz

Nassar realises to his horror that he got a 2 for 1 deal. Kerry (twin) needs the drama focused on her.

Daisy

If I was the twin I would have liked them to edit out her running to the toilet with the poops.

Maz

Again, interesting pick of bridesmaids.

Justin is a jerk. Priorities 1) Work 2) Play. Mate, what about your children?

Maz

According to the Daily Mail there is some wife swapping in the future.

brain dead dave

Surely that’s not part of “the “experiment”. Will we see the Fall Of Troy repeated in history?

Windsong

How progressive.

Daisy

Anyone notice that Carly just married Bill Spencer, and Justin just married a bunch of girls who all sound like Ja’mie?

Bolders

Nasser was a bit weird – I’m giving him the benefit of the doubt because of the situation and cameras etc. but this comment put him halfway on my shit list:
Wife: I’m looking forward to getting into your head to find out who you are and you getting into my head-
Nasser: Oh i’ll get into you [lunges for a kiss]

Listen to the words and understand the context you fool.
And what’s with the obsession with skin care and lip balm? He comes across as a bit prissy.

Daisy

I wasn’t sure if Nassa paid her an insult when she commented on his nice skin and he replied something like “Moisturize, but we’ll get to that”. Maybe pint sized Nassa isn’t very deep.

Bolders

Daisy that question of hers sounded like a prompt from the PRODucers: it’s not the first thing a wife would say to her husband

Daisy

Yes, no doubt. Although he might have been glistening.

Daisy

I reckon Troy is possibly gay and doesn’t know it yet.

Maz

How does one go about obtaining the job of a relationship expert????
Blair and Sean are perfectly matched because they have the shared experienced of been the cheated party. Let’s ignore that they live on opposite sides of the country and (how should be put it delicately?) different sex drives.

Oh…Blair is the one with the dodgy tattoo…”Burgers for life”.

Daisy

I was flipping between IAC and MAFS. Sean says he is ready to give up his wild ways and settle down, so what do the sexperts do; give him one of his one night standers.
To answer your question, Maz, on how you get a job as a tv psych? Maybe you have to be prepared to have viewers think you are a real drip, and ffd you.

Maz

Hell…just put their tinder profiles on screen and be done with it.

Why is Blair bragging she is a slut?

Maz

Sean is thick as two planks. Dude, she had it tattooed all over her arm she was married before.

Maz

“This is not a one night stand”, intones the expert, “they are in it for the long haul.”🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 Are we watching the same program?

Daisy

Maz, I think I will go on MAFS. I don’t think being already married will be an obstacle, just as the groom living across the country isn’t a problem.
I could doll up and pack on the make up while my besties gathered around and squealed and showed their support by getting stuck into the bubbles and squealing some more.
I’d like a nice groom who is ready to settle down because his heart’s been broken ..and a holiday in Europe. Being in our 60s, there would be some grunting, snoring and bed farting, and I wouldn’t wake up with my make up intact and my false eyelashes in place. I would probably wake up with my eyelashes one on my cheek and the other I would have to spit out.

Maz

Ashley -the moment she realises she has been screwed over by the producers.

brain dead dave

It’s still a better deal than being screwed by Troy.

Daisy

Tell you what….I have seen some lovely wedding dresses. Blair’s dress is pretty, simple and summery, and Carly’s was lovely last night.

Maz

We liked Jo’s dress the best.

Daisy

I’m afraid I didn’t notice Jo’s dress, what with all the seal clapping and salivating. Her not me.

Maz

Ashley is praying that she will make it back home alive as Troy obsessively pets her like an Un-Sub in Criminal Minds.

Daisy

Troy is just bullshirting. It’s obvious he is only trying to get famous. He’s just being a dickhead.

WHY

Yes, Maz, and what’s with the references and fascinatiion with her Mother?!!!

Daisy

Gabriel looks a bit like Cameron Diaz.

Daisy

I am impressed with Nasser after his lovely reaction to Gabriel’s revelation. I am loking forward to the dinner. I bet producers have set up the husband swapping.
Now I might get sucked in to the One Night with my Ex.

WHY

All I see when I look at Nasser is Harpo Marx from the Marx Brothers!!! Look him up and you’ll know what I mean. 😌 What’s with all the women who have the “trout pout” look? They can’t even annunciate their words correctly due to the lips being so swollen and have an ugly lip profile 😙

Daisy

Yes, Why. He reminds me of a little guinea pig. None of them would be my type. But we could probably all say that.
I look forward to the dinner, even though I know it’s all going to be a set up of wife/husband swapping and claws coming out.

Maz

More like, “my plastic surgery is better than your plastic surgery” and I have way more “tinder hits” than you.

Daisy

I’m looking forward to tonight’s show. I wonder who will be the loudest Jo or Troy, or Davina in a qiuet loud way. Who will get the most drunk? I can’t recall names but the tradie. Who will be in the bathroom crying the most? Jo and Gabriel.

Jazzman

Troy reminds me of many of Jim Carey’s characters.

Daisy

Oh yeah Jazzman. You picked it.

Maz

Davina would not be out of place on Ladette to Lady.

Daisy

She would not be out of place in Kal (Kalgoorlie).

brain dead dave

Or King’s Cross, Soho, Times Square or Amsterdam.

Maz

Let’s do the maths on this one. Blair who has been married has had 20-30 partners and she has ‘had like. quite a lot of long term relationships” … Mmm, what is her definition of long term? A week? A month?
Sean has had 200 +…

brain dead dave

Of course, Sean used a condom for every one of those 200 plus liasons that he can’t completely recall. Now he’s ready to settle down and be a good citizen. He’s probably worn out and has a low sperm count and needs Viagra and porn to get in the mood.

Daisy

Maz, some of those relationships might have been simultaneous.

Daisy

Maz, some of those relationships might have been simultaneous.

Maz

Nassar & Gabrielle have done the deed. TMI. Think of your daughter.

Maz

Alicia has been friend-zoned by Matt the plumber.

Maz

Troy accuses Ashley of being an alcoholic. Only one week in and she has to self medicate to endure Troy.

brain dead dave

Troy’s very forceful with the pashing and lunging and grabbing and groping.. It’s David Attenborough animal foreplay. It’s pretty sick stuff. Ashley’s leaning as far as possible from him. Doomed. Love lies bleeding.

Daisy

Lunging and grabbing now comes under the banner of “sexually inappropriate behaviour”. 🙄

brain dead dave

Troy is going in for a pash like a white pointer goes in to swallow chunks of whale meat.

Maz

Charlene reads Davina like a picture book-Basic Bitch.

Daisy

Tradie summed Davina up completely correctly. No matter how Davina tried to paint her comment, she’s a barracuda. Or is that barramundi?

WHY

Hysterical – love it. 🙂

Maz

Davina announces to everyone that Ryan is crap in bed.

brain dead dave

Davina could have really rubbed it in and added that he actually crapped in the bed, too.

Daisy

He could have announced to everyone that Davina’s boobs and lips are fake. 😜

Maz

The bubble has burst for Jo.

Daisy

Poor Jo, that bubble was one of those tiny snot bubbles.

brain dead dave

I fully expected Jo’s wedding dress to burst.

Maz

The Witches Three. Davina announces her plan to steal “Deano’.

brain dead dave

Deano’s wife is so hot and looks like Julianne Moore. When Davina hears about dumb arse Dean’s Cro Magnon sexual politics, she might cool off a bit.

Maz

Yeah. No.

Daisy

Quote of the night was from Nasser; “Sex is 5 minutes. Love is an hour or so”. 😂😂😂😂

brain dead dave

I thought it was an Eternity deal. If people were only married for one hour, would the world be a better place?

Windsong

Depends. Let’s ask a divorce lawyer.

Daisy

Tell you what Maz; you got this. And I am enjoying comments from everyone.

Daisy

My theory is that Davina has volunteered to play the maneater. She has thrown herself into the ro,e. Who meets a guy on tv then talks about having sex with them. I have become the “not in my day” generation.