MasterChef starts tonight

Tune in to Ten from 7.30pm for the “best season evah”.
How many episodes before we see a red silicone mould?


It finishes at 9.10pm. Tomorrow and Wednesday it runs from 7.30-8.40pm and on Thursday we get a whopping 2 hours. The blurb for the mega episode says: The top 24 contestants enter the kitchen for their first mystery box challenge. Later, the bottom four will cook off in an elimination challenge. Who will be the first to leave in 2017?
Sunday is the good ole mystery box challenge, from 7-8.40pm.

We start with a montage of what lies ahead, including Heston (hope he’s happier than he was last year), a trip to Japan, return visits from Anna P (death star chocolate dome maker), Maggie Beer and Curtis Stone etc. Looks like some cool challenges ahead.
The would-be contestants arrive, clutching their Coles bags, and here are the judges. Not sure about Gary’s purple paisley tie, and Matt is wearing a subdued grey long suit coat, but his burgandy cravat has a bit of sparkle in it, because it’s the premiere. George doesn’t have to wear a tie, but his shirt is buttoned to the top – because he’s the young ‘un.
George gives them the inspriational speech and makes them do the “Yes, George”. Ick. (Next year, add “hire a good accountant” to your speech, Georgie.)
Ok, let’s cook! These auditions are never much to write about but we get a challenge on Thursday.
Three yesses and you get an apron; only one and you get a chance to cook again.
Up first is Mich, who’s 19 and from Melbourne. Here hero is Reynold. She’s the golden ball girl and she’s using red silicone moulds. Bingo! But she cooks with Cadbury chocolate! Hmm, product placement? She taught herself to cook by practising stuff she saw online.
Pia, 48, is making gnocchi with gorgonzola sauce with a parmesan crisp. That’s a lot of richness.
Meanwhile, Mich is assembling her golden ball – I like her trick of melting the edge of the half dome by pressing it on the base of a hot saucepan. She’s studying nutrition, so I love that she wants to open a dessert bar. The judges are suitable impressed, as the producers knew they would be, sending her in first.


Please tell me she can cook mains, too.
Here comes Italian Pia with her gnocchi – she’s giving me a Julie Goodwin “cooking for the family so ordinary people can relate” kind of vibe. No gels or foams here. She starts tearing up when they praise her. I hope she can make it through the fancy pants cheffy-type challenges.


Here comes a blonde girl with Chinese dumplings. She’s in.


Fifty-seven-year-old Benita gets the “older lady who’s quite a character” slot for her pork belly.


Here’s a bloke with a pretty yuzu dessert. (From memory this is about as much airtime as Matt Sinclair got in the audition last year.) Ah, his name is Bryan.


A roo dish by headband-wearer Samuel is through.


A professional singer with Persian heritage makes a chicken and rice dish with “stock spheres”.


We hear mum mentioning she cooks it a different way, and is questioned whether the rice is cooked enough. Daughter brushes her off. And then tries to flirt a bit with Presto. She mentions how she is modernising it for MasterChef. They are totally going to tell her she should have done it the old-school way. She starts begging for her life before they’ve even tasted it.
She’s the first one that makes it to air as being rejected. Maybe a redemption story next year?
Uh oh – someone else makes a parfait that doesn’t set.
A girl with a white punky do is getting a lot of commentary time, and she was in the opening montage, so we know she’s through.
A string of people is knocked back.
Pete from Perth is making confit salmon. He’s the laidback Aussie bloke crane operator (remember Brett the bobcat driver, who went on to win?).


He knows how to make a foam and a is a George-style plater with nasturtium leaves. The judges love it. Onya, Pete.
Muscle-bound Ben leaves the gym and cooks a dish that’s a nod to his Ditch heritage and gets through.
They like the girl who made a dish she describes as tasting “like a burning pirate ship”.


Here comes handsome Dr Ray with “bacon and eggs” – a bowl of soft-poached egg and yummy bits, covered in a smoked potato foam. And he has two cute kids.
A blonde ponytail girl who looks a lot like dessert queen Kylie from a few seasons back presents a pho-paccio. It’s clever plating but unfortunately.
Oh no – another contestant with a brain injury! Following on from dessert specialist Karmen from last year – who was injured in a skiing accident – we have a young fella whose car was stolen the night before last year’s auditions and he was “injured in the process”. What does that mean? He chased them and was beaten up? Is it before the courts and he can’t say more? He was in hospital for nine weeks. Josh’s dish is the Japanese “Duck in the Wetlands” and they lap it up.
Poor Emily is trying to talk to the camera but Nanna keeps stealing the limelight. She’s doing the first panna cottas of the night, but they are mini ones that are just one element of her lychee dessert. Gary says she’s made a few errors. George says there’s too much sugar. But Matt likes her creativity so he sends her through to the second chance cook. Perhaps she’ll do better without a well-intentioned Nanna yelling at her.
We get a few more second chance cooks.

Here comes cheery, punky-looking Jess, a 29-year-old Melbourne nurse. She should cope well in the stressful reality TV environment. She’s created a Japanese-style savoury dessert using matcha (take note, Hashtaggers) and beetroot.


The judges love her handwritten collection of recipes, with pretty watercolour illustrations. So if she goes far in the comp, we already know what her cookbook will look like.
As Presto tastes, George uses the cover provided by his giant coat to mouth to camera “It’s amazing!”. Jess is through. “You are the textbook contestant we dream about finding,” Presto says.
Saffron-poached pears with smoked vanilla ice cream man has a cute, cheeky kid who’s brought in to the judging station to give Daddy his apron.
Salmon man gets through and, like the others today, he’s learnt MasterChef likes it when you talk about family memories and inspiration.
A few girls get the nod.
Beardie WA lawyer Ben makes “Sunday roast”, with 18 aprons already gone. He’s brought along some native WA wax flowers to go with the dish. He’s suitably emotional about the prospect of a food career and does a big “Oh What a Feeling” leap as he leaves the room. He has a Matt Sinclair vibe with his sincerity and passion.

To top that we have a molecular gastronomy/theatre guy, who once made lickable wallpaper for a Charlie and the Chocolate Factory-themed school project. Dammit – there goes the theme for Heston week! Callan is doing a Japanese salmon tartare. He’s only 18. You seem lovely, but you know you can just do an apprenticeship, right, Callan? You’re not 40 and with a mortgage to pay.


George is doing the hiding behind Presto thing again so he can make faces at Garry. They think it’s sensational. Cue the orchestra! Sneaky Callan gives his family a heart attack by hiding the apron behind his back – there’s that theatre background.

Tomorrow night it’s the second chance cook, and they get to impress Maggie Beer.
Well, that went for far too long but at least they whipped through the contestants. And while we had some emotional back stories it was all delightfully restrained after MKR’s excess.
I do love that MasterChef posts lots of food pix to social media, which MKR annoyingly stopped doing this season.



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Bobi

I am so excited. I feel like I have waited all year for this.

brain dead dave

Go fetch the golden ball, fella!

Maz

First red silicon mould spotted.
And first Nonna incantation.
And George lusting after the 19yo.

brain dead dave

Alas, Ma$terchef, we know thee too well.

There is nothing new under your culinary sun.

George beats Gary to the 19yo. He eats with his eyes. Boom boom ,stake the room.

Brussellsprout

I know. No suspense at all- red mounds, passion, means so much, dead rellies and unset parfait all in the first Ep.
Where to go from here?

Bobi

The golden ball girl seems to be a delight. Good television.
George is slightly OTT. Less George, more contestant would be good.

Liberty

FFS – Could they just lose the movie soundtrack?

Sara

Yes, first contestant in with the red domes😂

brain dead dave

I’m looking at George’s “dome” on The Project.

Maz

They now have their sacrificial older contestants.

brain dead dave

They’re deader than the meat about to be served this season.

Von

I will watch because I like MC, but I could have used a break after the interminable MKR. If there are too many references to dead inspirational rellies, or tears, or any over- the-top emotionalism, I’ll turn off and wait for the cooking. Please let this cooking show be about cooking.

Bobi

I switched channels for a moment to Australian Story. Tears flowed.
Decided to come back for the fake stuff. Less fraught.

Bobi

Thanks. I will read.
i was going to watch on iview when I was less tired and emotional but this looks like a better option.

Fijane

Heard him on the radio with my 15yo in the car. She was very impressed … and so was I. Made me want to go to youtube to brush up on the algebra I use to solve number puzzles.
I bet he could never make me understand the “two trains leave stations on the same tracks…” question, though.

Fijane

Four corners story was also heartbreaking. Nathan Bracken’s pain was palpable.

Bobi

Another one I thoought I would watch in small doses. There’s only so much sobbing I can do in one hit.

Brussellsprout

How good was mr wootube!

Pandy

Proud to say my daughter works on Australian Story. I watch it because its a good show, and just to see her name on the credits.

Sara

So many blue plasters

Maz

First sob that involves a traumatic head injury.

Jewels

So far i like the Dutch boy (i have the same heritage) and the crane driver….who seemed so honest and the plate looked delicious.

Bobi

We have some back stories here that are going to drive me bat shit crazy.

Maz

Emily has the trifecta, red silicon moulds, a cheering grandma and the departed grandfather card but only gets a second chance. (Guess she is not photogenic enough for Gary and George).

Littlepetal

Oh, poppy’s book has reincarnated into Jess’s book

brussellsprout

I know. Can’t. Bear. More. Poppy.
But despite that I kind of liked Jess – she seemed chirpy and fun, so I’m not currently holding it against here that she is the contestant they dream about (Market) or that she had a cook book in hand. She’ll probably turn into a total dud and I’ll be whining about her attitude before the end of the week!

Jewels

The good thing with this show is that they have to be able to cook to get on the show….MKR should be a a lot more selective and get onn people who can cook….we had to go thru weeks of bad cooking till we got to the real cooks😣

Littlepetal

I hope some of these are not one trick pony. They really perfected the audition dish

Smythe

Hope so, too. Can the Reynold clone (although female) cook savory?

brain dead dave

Yes, not much difference between a one trick pony and a one trick phony.

Humanity cannot live on balls alone

Maz

Child prodigy has a grandma with cancer. Why should we even know that?

Jewels

But that 18year old is so good for such a young person….that dish was wow🙄

Fijane

He could have just said he was raising money for charity, without parading his gran’s illness. I wonder how she feels about it.

Maz

George gives them the inspirational speech and makes them do the “Yes, George”. Ick. (Next year, add “hire a good accountant” to your speech, Georgie.)

Is that why there are no accountants this year on MC? I was hoping for an accountant contestant to be asked “Why do you want to be on Masterchef?” and answer, ” To understand the minutiae of the labour costs in running a restaurant.”

Brussellsprout

I loved Juz’s remark about hire a good accountant.
Then Maz topped it beautifully- hats off to you both!

brain dead dave

I think Zumbo is being sliced and diced on one of the current affairs shows tonight for similar stuff to George.

Maz

Just saw the Zumbo piece. Two questions, why are the employees trying to recover their super via FWA? ATO is the appropriate agency to pursue this claim: https://www.ato.gov.au/individuals/super/in-detail/growing/unpaid-super/
2. Why are they complaining about “default” account numbers obviously entered a)because most payroll systems won’t allow you to leave this blank b)you failed to complete your super choice form.

That said, obviously there seems to be an element of exploitation across the hospitality industry of its workers (particularly foreign). It seems to be common practice not to pay overtime.

Hate to be their (Zumbo/George) accountants: http://www.smartcompany.com.au/business-advice/legal/accounting-firm-found-liable-for-clients-employee-underpayment-in-precedent-setting-decision/

brain dead dave

No wonder Zumbo didn’t feature in the promotional Ma$terchef “journey”.

He’s perfected the “crookembouche”

Sara

Did you see the captions said crock and rush or similar

Lola

Nice one Adam.

Brussellsprout

Adam is always perfect.

brain dead dave

Not me. Thanks.

Fijane

I’ve always had a few glitches due to my device being old, but no new problems.

Bobi

No problems here.

Pandy

I got that too the other day, but all good now.

Fijane

Why is always the grans who are venerated by these young cooks and not the mums and dads? I felt bad for the mum standing to the side while her daughter (gnocchi lady) raved about the gran. It is likely that the parents did all the unglamorous teaching, like how to chop vegies, how to wash up, not to mention providing all the ingredients for the young cook to experiment on, and probably has just as much skill as the gran anyway.

Brussellsprout

It is a truth universally acknowledged on reality cooking shows that a single person in possession of a cooking dream must have at least one dead grandparent.

Fijane

So Nonnacide is acceptable when pursuing your dream??

Pandy

Probably makes more of a sob story.

Carole

Thanks Juz. We knew Callan & some others got through as they showed them in the preview of what’s coming up. They showed Callan opening the door to Heston, so we know he makes it till that week.
At least they didn’t make us wait too long to find out what was in that bloody golden ball. They had it first.
That girl with all the beetroot. Yuk yuk yuk.

Littlepetal

They get so excited with the golden ball. She just piped the ball with some cheese etc etc. A good presentation but really not in the calibre of Reynold

brussellsprout

I’m just agin her because of the red silicone mould. But she seemed okay other than that crime against originality.

brain dead dave

It’s not her fault that George called her “darling” and crawled up her arse. Wasn’t sure if she’d created a golden ball or a golden calf.

Personally, I’m disappointed that someone so young is being a sheep and getting tattooed.

The sacrificial older contestants that Maz referred to will get much shorter shrift.

Bobi

I must admit I was impressed until I read you comment. You are quite right, it was more dazzle dazzle than good cooking. So we are giving her six weeks?

Littlepetal

I think the show will still focus more on the sweet young thing.

Fijane

I thought there were quite a few decent looking fellas in the top 24, but I think they showed wives and girlfriends for all of them. Lucky cooking skill is the only criteria for this show – isn’t it?

lulu

Has Matt Preston been reading a lot of Charles Dickens over the break?

brain dead dave

A Tale Of Two Jowls.
Barnaby Fudge.
Bleak Kitchen.
Lard Times.
The Pickwick Capers.
Nicholas Pickleby.

lulu

He was certainly dressed like Mr. Pickwick.

Sara

He’s so fat I was wondering if he could see his nether regions😂