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Maz

Hahahahahahah….Aldi the epitome of luxury. Hahahaha

Zhee

Aldi is just cheap. Would not buy a thing in there. Even as a student with no money I avoided Aldi…

Maz

Smug (can Will keep his hands off Karlie. He is coming off as a possession jerk): Anyway, once again the judges demonstrate their wonderfully expansive vocabulary “Ooooooh, wow” murmur the judges as they enter the apartment.

The floor choice of polished concrete is perfect. The colour palette is divine. The judges are ‘blown away’ by how superbly detailed the apartment is right down to the $100 truffles under the cloche.

However, the shelving over the bar is not sleek or glamorous. It feels unresolved.

On to the butlers’ pantry, it contains another oven and dishwasher. This is genius as it is another self contained kitchen within the kitchen.

The kitchen is sleek, black and glamorous. It is the most divine kitchen eva states Shaynna.

Maz

BB: How many times can you say ‘beautiful’?

The judges love the Bosch appliances, the cabinetry. It is so beautifully coherent it actually sings.

It is, says Neale, beautifully understated it makes it feels sophisticated.

The bling pendant beautifully balances the masculinity of the kitchen.

Again, the butlers pantry includes an additional oven and dishwasher.

BUT

Darren notes there is a lack of drawers. Neale interjects and explains it is a generational thing. People of that age don’t put their plates in drawers. (People store plates in drawers??)

If this was Nova, they would bitch about the half dead lemon tree branch but because it is not, “It is,” observes Shaynna, “a high end euro kitchen”.

They score a perfect 30 tying with Team Smug.

Erin

Most older people i know prefer drawers, because you don’t have to lean down as much to look for stuff and you can see at a glance what you have, rather than things getting stuck at the back of the cupboard.
And yes, as long as the drawer can handle it, i would put plates in drawers…

Maz

I understand the convenience of drawers for saucepans, baking items, tupperware etc but for the stackable items plates, bowls, etc thought a cupboard would be more convenient. Then again, that would be dependent on the position of your cupboard and the number of plates (only have four).

The bigger question is how practical are these kitchens? You couldn’t watch TV if someone is cooking in there. No consideration has been given to the acoustics of that floorplan.

Erin

Yeah, massive kitchens to cook up a big feast but half of the apartments only put in a dining table for six, and the living areas look tiny.

Maz

Boys:
Maths is definitely not the Boys’ strong suit as they blow their bonus point in a stupid attempt to win.

“It is so different,” says Shaynna upon entering the kitchen as it has colour.
“The shade of green chosen was a favourite of the art deco period,” posits Neale desperately recycling last week’s laundry room observation and trying to convince the viewer that this is an art deco apartment.

Darren more interested in proving that the laser measurer was not a one off, whips it out again to confirm that the bench is 3.9m.

It is a par-tay kitchen. Coyote Ugly-style.

9.5,9.5,9 +1 =29

Maz

The Girls:

Upon entering the kitchen, it is the usual exclamation of ‘Oh, wow” and Darren exhibits objectophilia as he hugs the fridge, the cabinetry and goes weak at the knees over the Gaggenau appliances.

It is a serious cooks’ kitchen. The lighting is fantastic (after Julia did not want the pendants not that we think the ones chosen are effective).

BUT
The bench is stingy at only 2.9m and the steam oven is above eye level which is an accident waiting to happen.

No mention of the cook books on display in the glass cabinets. Is that a generational thing as well?

9.5+9+9.5=28

Maz

What can we say? It is getting to the point of ridiculous what the judges say to justify the continual low balling of Nova.

The producers decide to replicate the missing splashback storyline with Nova that they run earlier in the week with S+1 but on the day before reveal. They don’t get the same reaction from Kim as they do from Julia so the producers send in O’Briens to save the day but here goes:

The stone counter top is beautiful, the breakfast bar is beautiful but as Shaynna observes you can’t have two heroes as they cancel each other out.

They hate the mirror splashback but no comment about the previous four mirror splashbacks.

The cabinets are top heavy.

They will concede it does have a practical layout BUT there is no emotion here and they can’t see two buyers fighting over it.

It is the most irregular apartment in the history of the Block, adds Neale.

8+8+8=24

Erin

Thanks for your recaps Maz 🙂
The boys kitchen is the same with the dark cupboards on top and light down the bottom, and a mirror splash back, yet they got scored heaps better?!
Fair judging and scoring?! I think not!

Maz

Codeword is REALITY.

brain dead dave

Something that has nothing to do with The Block.

brain dead dave

“a high end euro kitchen”

Oh! Wow! So kangaroos can have kitchens?

No one can dig the masculinity of my kitchen, with the Jimi Hendrix, Rolling $tones posters et al. Oh! Wow!. Is it warm and soulless, alright.

Thanks for your work, Maz.

brain dead dave

I store plates in cupboards but then I’ve seen live chickens kept in cupboards, too. You just don’t see that kind of creativity on The Block. That’s how we celebrate diversity and inclusiveness in this country.

Jason

Why would you need 2 dishwashers? or 2 ovens? Just obscene wealth!
And don’t get me started on mirror splashbacks – you would be forever cleaning them! Or do people who live in these places, just eat out all the time (and have pristine showroom kitchens to impress)

Maz

In light of that the point was made repeatedly last night that the butlers’ pantry was a kitchen within a kitchen we assume that the larger kitchen is for display purposes only.

SPOILER

I can’t help feel that the judges were simply judging Freedom Kitchens as the kitchens were basically designed, installed and now subsequently advertised by Freedom (see https://www.freedomkitchens.com.au/gallery/block-2016).

And throwing in a conspiracy theory Nova were marked down because they included a splash back from O’brien and a dining bench from Footprint Furniture no doubt creating marketing and contractual issues for the producer and probably resulted in a somewhat miffed Freedom at not being able to claim 100% of the kitchen solution. With only 80% the score was adjusted accordingly.

Plus someone ought to tell the judges that looking like a 70’s office suite is not art deco. It’s a veneer look!

The Butler’s pantries should have been build as soundproof rooms with turbo driven exhaust fans and contained only coffee grinders, kettles, blenders, dishwashers and any kitchen appliance that emits annoying beep sounds together with open stoves for frying fish and onions, simmering curries or opening durians and Aldi’s washed rind cheese.

As it is it seems the butler’s pantry is the ‘kitchen’ and the kitchen is the ‘pantry’.

The whole layout of these apartments is poor with last nights revealing comment of how it was a long walk from the front door to the kitchen being somewhat understated. Try doing that walk with two arms full of shopping bags pushing a pram with a dog at your feet.

Just as well it is a carbon negative rooftop to compensate for the 4 overs, 2 dishwashers and … wait … these units have got more kitchens than bathrooms as next week it is ‘outdoor kitchens’ … or will that be a pantry?

Congrats to Kyal and Kara and newborn baby boy Ziya.

Maz

The codeword for tonight was Challenge as the producers desperately try to funnel money towards the Boys & S1 only to be thwarted by Team Smug.

Scotty runs through what each team has won with only Team Smug and Nova having money left:

Smug: $39k+1McCafe Awards
BB:$40k+$40vault
Nova: $15400 + 2 McCafe Awards
Boys $20000 + 3 McCafe Awards
Girls $10600 +$50k appliances +1 McCafe Awards

The first challenge was recycling the fine money by finding the buried treasure on the beach. This backfires magnificently with Smug picking up $5k and Nova $2.5k.

The interlude is the contestants getting spray tanned and posing for a pool photo shot for Womans Day. We note that the men were modestly dressed but the women less so.

Next is the $5k for canape challenge and a crass cross promotion for Human Nature.

Smug win $2.5k and S1 win $2.5k as Julia squealed like a teenage girl at a Beiber concert when he was in his prime.

Other storylines:

BB kitchen is seen as a Brady Bunch homage by Sasha.

The boys need to do an hour labour in an exchange for an hour labour from Dave Franklin and Keith and Dan. Can’t wait for the other teams to find out.

WHY

Dan and Carleen’s kitchen reminds me of a school’s Science Lab from the 70s.

Zhee

Kind of liked Sasha’s kitchen best. Why on earth would I need more island bench? The only issue was indeed the steamer… I would need a ladder to get the stuff out… Was indeed not a good decision.

Baby Boomers’s kitchen looked worse than Nova’s. That brown is not nice. But the critique regarding missing drawers was useless. Oh, perhaps I am just a stupid European, but hey, we never put plates into drawers, except if you might run out of space? I think the reason is pretty simple, if you pull out the drawer, due to the movement the plates would start moving and slipping (could scratch the plate surfaces then).

PS: My kitchen is smaller than some of those pantries and I am somehow able to cook and bake and do whatever I need in my kitchen without a single problem. Oh, and I did not get a dishwasher, think it’s a waste of energy (on the otherhand, we are only a 2 people household, no kids).

Smythe

Although I am not a fan of the Novas (actually not a fan of any of the teams this season) and I did not like their kitchen stools, timber island extension or black cabinets I think the judges are being overly harsh with them. AND not just harsh but rude and demeaning. The Baby Boomers…too much brown and old looking, the boys…not luxurious art deco but cheap retro look and ugly black cabinets on top just like Nova, the Whiners….elegant but steam oven way too high & didn’t like the stove top on the bench, didn’t like the stools and Smugsters…elegant but too dark for me. All of the stools in the apts except for one looked very uncomfortable.

Too many ovens & dishwashers. Mirrored splashbacks….so much fun to clean. I wonder if they will be throwing in a maid, butler and personal chef with each apartment.

If there is another season of The Block (which there probably will be) I hope that they rethink the apartments and just do individual homes.

Maz

Exactly, it is not that the judges are disappointed with Nova’s penthouse and don’t have valid reason to be, it is that they are absolutely horrid and not constructive in their criticism. The paperweight comment was the point this season jumped the shark.

Maz

Yeah, what can be said about tonight’s episode?
1. Tonight is the long predicted Aldi cooking challenge. It is such a strong challenge that they have split it over two nights (not). Contestants need to cook a chicken main and chocolate dessert for Brendan Fevola and his wife. Kim can’t cook so he tiler Ahmed steps up to plate.

Will wants to win purely to piss the other teams off.

The Boys are hoping their charm will win the day.

Tomorrow we will find out who win the $6k for first place and $4k for second.

2. The other teams learn of the barter arrangement that the boys have with Keith and Dan. Not happy are the teams who have budgeted. http://www.tvweeklogieawards.com.au/news/articles/2016/10/more-tension-on-the-block/

3. Kingi is back to render Team Smug’s wall.

4. Code word is RESERVE

PollyB

I’ve been ffwding old Dan for a few weeks, & the missus is getting the same treatment now, the schlock aspect is growing so lots of ffwd there. And now Nova are getting the ffwd flick too. Julia was such a sook at first but has adjusted from what we see. Nova are just whingeing more & more & more. Granted the judges a picking shit out of their design but that’s the point, their apartment doesn’t have a cohesive style snd certainly not fit for a penthouse. I can’t look at Mr Nova, Mrs Nova is very bossy. They’re both immature – we hold a grudge for life. Great example to her students.
And yeh, they’re gonba have 3 kitchens! Except W&K. And 3 toilets. Anyone have a cleaning business to flog at the open house!!

Juz

I actually tuned in to The Block tonight but the way one clueless woman handled raw chicken was scaring me. And then she wanted to boil beans in the kettle. And another woman let her chocolate seize and described it as burnt. No – you just gots heaps of steam in it aka water because of the strange way you were melting it. It annoyed me too much so I turned back to Georgia Love instead.

Maz

What is more annoying, these people proclaim to be Block fans yet they act surprised when there is a cooking challenge which has been a standard challenge for the past few season particularly with ALDI as a sponsor.

Maz

Can it get any worse? Cutting an insufferable episode short:
1. The Boys win $6k and S1 place second $4k. Geez what a surprise.
2.Team Smug comprehensively demonstrate what entitled, self satisfied little $#@^* they are. Karlie on the last shopping day takes the Cam Van. Kim asks how long she will be. Two hours replies Karlie. Eight hours later, Karlie returns with absolutely no shame or remorse. No-one told her, that they needed the van. Yeah Karlie keep telling yourself that.
3. Kennards Hire get their plug in as Kim finds alternative transport.
4. Nova’s children visit.

Codeword AUCTION

brain dead dave

It can definitely get worse, Maz. $chlocktastically worse.

Started my day watching the girls cook breakfast on the Today show this morning. I throw up with Today.

Thanks again ,Maz.

Smythe

Thanks for the recap Maz. These old buildings that have and are being reno-d by Schlocksters aren’t the only thing that need to be demonlished and renovated. It’s time for the same to happen to The Schlock. New hosts, new judges, individual homes, un-shlocky teams, new foremen, less scripting and less faux drama. Maz, once again give you credit for being able to watch entire episodes.

Diamme

Thanks Maz. I follow and appreciate your posts. I do not understand why it is all about styling.

Maz

This season of the Block has been rather flat. There doesn’t seem to be the same level of activity on Twitter and Whirlpool that there was for Blockatogon so here is why this season has failed:

1. The building. On paper this building ticked on the boxes. It was unique, it seems to be in a revitalised suburb and there was lip-service paid to respecting its heritage but the building itself has become invisible. Watching this series you would not know that this building was any different from Block Glasshouse. ie. In other words for a series about renovation the building itself has not featured.

2. It’s Art Deco or is it? At the commencement of the series, the point was made that the original timber had to be restored and the design had to respect the Art Deco heritage of the building yet a) there was no education of either the contestants or the viewer as to what art deco was and what contemporary art deco style is. The best they could espouse was Ooooh Darren Palmer’s latest book we are plugging has a chapter on art deco and Jenna telling the contestants that the Titanic (Edwardian era) & Gatsby movies were deco…ah no…b) the only contestants who are ahead now ditched the art deco brief from the get-go. Look at the BB. They are the only couple to extensively incorporate original material into the apartment and the buyers advocate’s told them to cover it up and paint over it.

3.The layout. For what essentially is a three bedroom apartment, it has three toilets and three kitchens??? ( We can only assume the end function is for fifty foreign students to be slumming in each apartment). It doesn’t make much sense and the open floor plan really is open plan and not one contestant has given any consideration to the acoustics of that space. We have seen no attempt to minimise the noise. No acoustic panelling on the walls or ceiling and the worse floor treatment to minimise the noise in concrete and timber.

And let’s not get started on the loggia. Would love to know what the rational for that was.

4. The contestants. They all hate each other and the general consensus seems that people haven’t found a particularly team to barrack for. This season they are openly undermining each other. After Tinder, people were alienated by Julia’s antics. We are still on the fence of how much that was real and how much that was strategy on her part.

5. The judges (and Buyers Advocates). It has long been said that the judges need to go or be balanced out by a builder and real estate agent. Too much of the criticism has been based on the contestants and not the room. The judges (and Buyers Advocates) thought they were so clever making snide and derogatory remarks about particular suburbs in Melbourne to infer KC are bogans in such a manner that they would not pick up on it. They did pick up on it and it was offensive.

The comments have not been constructive and the scoring has been dodgey with flawed rooms receiving perfect scores.

5. The budgets. They were very coy about the budget this year in not revealing the value of the vouchers. The contestants should be held to account so we don’t see the farce of the producers trying to rig challenges to funnel money to the boys. In some ways, the contestants who stick to budget are penalised.

6. Lead Time. What are the rules in terms of ordering products? You should be able to capitalise upon the whole period of the build to order products. (It is not fair that one team playing by the rules picks a cornice as it is all that is available in the time frame but a second team can retrofit a cornice with a longer lead time during redo week). Personally, since there does not seem to be the appetite to eliminate contestants before the Block proper anymore, the contestants should be able to sit down with an architect and construct their vision on CAD or whatever the appropriate architectural software is prior(and liaise with key suppliers (we are looking at CSR who does seem to have a more interesting back catalogue than just gyprock) to the Block commencing so that a)there is a more consistent product at the end b)and any tweaks or better use of interior space can be sorted out. These are not exactly cheap apartments.

That is my rant…I would have love at least one contestants mining the Catherine Martin http://www.catherinemartin.com/ since after all, we are continual told that Gatsby is Art Deco. And no more bloody Pinterest!!!!

PollyB

This is a perfect bedroon for this building.

WHY

Springing up on the remainder of the four-hectare factory site around The Block is a sea of construction as Mr Stamoulis’ $250 million project to build a village of 258 three-level townhouses on former factory land at the southernmost end of Sandridge precinct nears completion. by Simon Johansen The Sydney Morning Herald May 2016

Notice how all the contestants NEVER mention the neighbours?!!! Must be written into their contract not to talk about the elephant in the room! Obviously very bad for business.